Yes, I am a very sensitive person, but I am resilient. I’ve learned to feel my feelings and not try to be something I’m not. It’s ok to not be strong. Of course, I realize you want to feel better. I wish you all the best. Also, I would get a consultation with a family law attorney to find out your legal rights.

Hello @marinaorlic and welcome to Mayo Connect. I am so sorry for your loss. This is not an easy road, @marinaorlic. It might take a year or more of diligent effort to make this adjustment. The time needed to recover from this loss is dependent on many factors such as how long you were married, the quality of your relationship, etc.

All of us, who have experienced the loss of a marriage or other long-term relationship, understand that you are hurting right now and that is normal. You are grieving the loss of the marriage, but also the loss of a dream. You had expectations of what your life would be like, and those expectations have met with profound dissapointment.

Realize that these feelings will take time to resolve. I am glad that you have a therapist and friends. Support of this type will help you as you adjust to a new normal.

Medication was mentioned, and you commented that, "I don't want to feel numb, I just don't want to be sad." There are antidepressant medications that are not numbing in the same way that tranquilizers might be. You might consider talking with a medical doctor about something that would be helpful to you as you recover from this experience. Sometimes, these medications are quite helpful to give you a bit more energy to adapt to the changes you are experiencing.

What activities do you enjoy that might get you out of house and also get your mind on other things? Do you like to read, walk, go to the movies, go out to lunch with friends? It is sometimes helpful to decide on one thing to do, every day, that might take your mind off of your hurt, disappointment, and betrayal.

Think of one thing that you could do each day and set up a schedule for the week. I would also encourage you to write about your feelings. On Connect there is a discussion group called, Journaling - The Write Stuff for You?" Here is the link to that discussion, https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/journaling-the-write-stuff-for-you/. I would encourage you to read the posts in that group. Here you will find many people who are going through the transitions of life, both physical changes and emotional changes, by journaling.

Might journaling be helpful? What about setting up a calendar listing one event each day, that will give you satisfaction?

I look forward to hearing from you again!