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Starved for affection/attention

Caregivers: Dementia | Last Active: Oct 21 12:37pm | Replies (47)

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@bonnie48

Last week my LO sneaked out of our local grocery store & walked 3 miles along a highway. Local police brought him home 5 hours later. Yesterday a social worker with Adult Protective Services showed up at our home during a snowstorm & asked me if she could help us. When she heard we are not on Medicaid she had no ideas for me except to ask if I had thought to ask our children for help. So 1) Why do “helpers” insist on telling us to ask adult children for help, as if we are too stupid to consider that? and 2) Can Adult Protective Services punish me somehow for my LO’s act of leaving home? Okay, one more: Do any of you lock your LO in your home?

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Replies to "Last week my LO sneaked out of our local grocery store & walked 3 miles along..."

I do keep the doors locked and give a key to guests/care givers, and they know to do the same. We have our doors with locks on the inside, and we have an alarm system that tells when a window is opened. He has tried to leave several times through doors or windows, so there is no other choice. I do not lock him in alone. If I need to take the garbage out or check the mail, I wait until he is asleep or when someone else here. It is sad and hard, especially when he tries to open the door when he is calm. One day he told our pastor that he is in "jail," and I added that we are both on "house arrest." But, all kidding aside, I am the one solely responsible for his safety, and if I want us to stay together at home, this is one of the solutions to make it happen. This has been a huge help to have the doors locked and all keys hidden and/or accounted for. I also make sure I have a key on me 24/7 - especially if I do run out for a few minutes to get something out of the car, mail, etc., because he has locked me out one time (that was a quick lesson to learn and not repeat). It is sad and just another level of the endless heart shattering that follows the trajectory of the disease, but a necessary element to stay at home.
Treasuring the moments and grateful for others that understand..
Jan

I lock our doors and turn on the alarm system at night, during the day when we are both inside and if I am outside working in the yard and can hear the alarm system. When we are outside the house, I have my husband carry a wallet with an apple tag so I can locate him if he gets away from me.

Many local police departments offer tracking systems to keep our loved ones safe. Someone recently told me that hospice can help with some issues if your LO has a terminal diagnosis.

Best of luck to you. It is a problem that we all face with you!