@judimahoney - The lack of intimacy can be devastating. It’s possible it’s a stage he will pass through. It’s not usual for the person with dementia to go through a stage of extreme self-centeredness. It can happen while they are still functioning fairly well. It’s a survival mechanism that helps them adjust to coping with everything that’s happening to them. I went through this with my husband when I was diagnosed with breast cancer about a year ago. When I shared the diagnosis with him, he rather callously answered “They can just cut it out and you’ll be fine right?” That was truly not the response I expected from my loving, caring, compassionate husband. I can’t speak for what would work for you but it was my faith that got me thru that season. He has since returned to being touchy-feely with both of us taking the initiative. Since the emotional, intuitive side blooms as the reasoning and rational side diminishes, I make sure that good feelings are associated with contact, sometimes in the form of complementing him, reassuring him, and telling him how important he is and how much I love him. Sometimes I get a chuckle and sometimes I get a loving response. It just depends where he’s at in the day. You’ll become more important in his life as he realizes how much he needs you. Use this time to build trust so he knows you’re there for him, and that could make the touchy-feely bloom again.