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Each Betrayal Begins With Trust
Thank you to all of you who have read my posts and have offered such kind and helpful support.
Just when I thought I could "trust" again, I found out something very disturbing last week about the psychologist who went AWOL on me in December, after working with her for several months. When we began our "therapy" I described my trust issues, which were valid, based upon prior experiences with Tele-Therapy.
Well, the good doctor told me that not only did she have a PhD, but was also a MD, and that she was so excited to help me, as she said she had great knowledge of all things "medical," making it easier for me to explain my symptoms, anxiety about not knowing what was wrong with me and things of that nature. I was paired with one of her colleagues a couple of months ago, and while I was hesitant to "trust" again, I decided that if I wanted to gain anything from this relationship, I would have to "trust" which I have.
My new psychologist informed me last week that the prior psychologist was not a MD, and you can imagine how I am feeling about this new information. Me being me, the insurance investigator, went online, paid money for reports and things of that nature, and guess what, she is not a doctor of medicine. I keep asking myself, "why did I not see the signs?" "How could someone do this to another person: LIE?"
Sutter wants me to file a complaint with the California Board of Psychology, however I have decided not to for several reasons: she already has enough problems, and I certainly do not have the energy/time to complete all the paperwork, be interviewed and things of that nature. On the other hand, I keep thinking, "I don't want this to happen to someone else...."
I feel such a sense of betrayal, but know I have to choose my battles, right? My God! It is amazing what one can find out about another person, a professional at that, by spending a minimal amount of money on one of those "verification" sites. I feel like a fool. Robbed might be a better word. She had surgery in September of last year, and I can remember her telling me, "Now I know, as a doctor, what it feels like to be a patient....." My life is starting to sound like a science fiction novel. My current psychologist cannot apologize enough about the situation, was astonished that I had empathy for this poor woman who lied to me, but what else could I do? I have to let this go, and I am sure in time, I will be able to do so. I've got to say though, that going forward I am really going to have to "verify" everyone, and I hate doing this,as I spent a career doing this, and thought that part of my life was over. What gives? How do people like this get away with such crap?
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That’s a very disappointing thing to experience. My goodness. It’s difficult to understand the woman’s reasons to misrepresent that way. I think I have a healthy dose of curiosity about healthcare providers, but I’m pretty trusting. I do take extra steps when a doctor is going to perform surgery or some procedure on me and check the court records in their county to see if any malpractice lawsuits have been filed against them. I also check their status on the public website for NC medical board. You can do an inquiry by name to get standing and any complaints. So far, things have checked out well.
Best of luck with your new therapist.
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6 ReactionsThank you. All evening I have been thinking about something my now dead mother used to say, "no one is above suspicion." I am still trying to wrap my head around this whole disaster. The woman did a real number on me, that is all I can say. But I assure you, I am not going to do anything untoward with the information I discovered about this "doctor" in the past few days. Admittedly, I would like to pen her a note and tell her exactly what I think about her.....
This is absolutely amazing Frances. And, needless to say, disgusting.
Reminds me of when I found out I'd been dating a sociopath - the details aren't worth repeating now, but to find out personally that there are people who actually thrive on subterfuge, misinformation, misleading and false presentations, is violently and emotionally upsetting and disgusting.
Glad you found out ... !!
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5 ReactionsWell it seems to me to be just a little white lie, because if I am not mistaken you have to go to medical school first then on to what you want to specialize in; in her case psychology .
How do I know this you ask; well my best friend is my former dentist now well retired, but I can consult him about medical issues because he had to qualify for being a doctor first. Even did his internship at Stony Brook in the ER.
So surely, in my opinion your doctor just wanted to make you feel better.
I hope this helps you.
Lastly, Oceans of love and peace to you!
Rob
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2 Reactionsin reply to @fef A "little white lie?" There are special requirements in California for psychologists, who I am sure you know have PhD. These people go to university to specialize in psychology and obtain a doctorate. In my case, she told me the following after she had surgery last year: "Now I understand, as a doctor, how patients feel these days when they go to the doctor. Medical care has certainly changed." "After my surgery when my doctor told me not to return to work, I chose you as my "test client" because I "know all about the medical problems you are facing and can help you and your clinicians come up with a diagnosis." "I know all about dementia and the friend you are taking care of because I did my residency in neurology."
I rest my case
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2 Reactionsin reply to @brandysparks Thank you. I am not on Facebook, but when the company I used to "verify" this person, they led me to her Facebook page, and while there was only a photograph of her arm, it was enough to tell me something I will refrain from posting. However, I could not help but notice the following she wrote about herself:
For every individual that I help, it's my greatest reward.
Feel better? How? By trying to convince me she was a MD when she was not. This was what a friend of mine used to call a "bald faced lie." Lies are lies, no matter what color.
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1 ReactionGeez. Amazing, right?!
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1 ReactionAgonizing!
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1 Reactionin reply to @brandysparks I can't help it if I took an Ethics course. Naturally, I might tell a "white" lie on occasion. Such as when someone asks me if I like their new outfit. I might say, "well, if you like it then that is all that matters. You look fine."
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