Thank you for your supportive response. I am not in an isolated area, in fact I live in one of most beautiful places in the world, Santa Barbara, CA. but I am isolated primarily due to finances, same thing with my car, I have one, can't drive it when didn't pass smog and so it's been sitting there for a year and half. Losing everything I had worked for, limited ablity to participate socially (how many free walks on the beach can one maintain friendships with for 15 years), a meal out, having friends over for dinner , travel even for a weekend all too prohibitive and then not wanting to burden friends with any of this. I was not allowed to work on SSI, and have tried finding something to substitute the $359. p/mo of SSI income so I can get off of it. I've lost all confidence in myself and it shows during interviews. I used to very creative and had an entreprenual spirit in my approach to life. After years of socialization decline, isolation, and SSI "conditioning" the harder it is to just to leave the house just go to the grocery store. I'm still looking for therapy despite a gazzilion horrific experiences, but am very careful with who and what treatments involving my brain health I attempt.