@yakyak9 - hang in there, is surgery the first step in your treatment journey? What type of surgery are you having - I had bilateral and the only part of the surgery that I'm still challenged with - was my definition of "Flat" and the surgeon's definition. I'm not as flat as I would have liked. I was 68 at the time and I had no desire for more surgeries for reconstruction. I have prosthetics and when I was fitted, they asked when I planned to have reconstruction since they've fitted others who had closures similar to mine that were waiting for reconstruction. Hindsight I should have taken a picture to say this is what I'm looking for - can you do this or not. I did see a surgeon that specialized in breast cancer; but I think he might also have specialized in surgeries in prep for reconstruction.

Are you TNBC with any mutation markers and do you know your stage or what course of treatment is in store for you? I'm TNBC with BRCA 2+ and had chemo treatment as my first step to see how the lumps would respond before surgery. Fortunately I had great response; but since I'm TNBC & BRCA2+ it was determine bilateral would most likely be my next treatment since I have a mutation. Oddly I'm the first in my family to have BC. I was also very fortunate to tolerate chemo very well - lost my hair (I really cut it off when it got too matted as it was falling out); but that was about all. After my bilateral, since there was a small spot in pathology during surgery, I then had radiation - again I tolerated that well. In about 6 weeks I will hit my first anniversary of my "remission".

I suggested to my family members, including my children, to have genetic testing done because of the BRCA2+ mutation. My son has the mutation but my daughter does not. I'm not sure if my siblings ever had the testing done - but that is their decision.

Again - hang in there, this is a site for individuals going through or who have gone through this journey and we are a safe place to commiserate, vent and just ask questions. But know you are your own person and will navigate this journey with your own experiences. So try not to compare our experiences too much to your own.