When I was first diagnosed in 2018, I don't know who the diagnosis hit harder, me or my wife. Probably my wife. As hard as my journey has been, I know it's very hard on her, and I know it's hard on you.

Have you changed doctors since your husband's first diagnosis? If so, I recommend that you ask your original doctor to send all their information to the new one. Your current doctor should have all of your husband's records and already know that he has lung cancer. I went through that when I moved from California to Alabama.

I know it's hard not to be scared. My lung cancer was originally diagnosed in 2018. In 2020, it metastasized to my brain. Now I consider scary speculation to be part of the journey. As recently as last August my doctor was concerned about a few lymph nodes that grew by 50% in 3 months. I got the PET scan and then my wife and I left for vacation before I knew the results. On vacation, I never told anyone about that test because as far as I'm concerned, until I'm told I have cancer again, I don't have cancer again. My follow up visit was the day after we returned from vacation and we learned I was right. False alarm.

I'm hoping for the same result with your husband. For now, he doesn't have a new cancer diagnosis, so that means there is no new cancer. Denial is an essential part of staying sane and still enjoying life after the initial diagnosis.

That's how I handle these situations. You'll have to find a way to stay positive through this journey. It might be my way, which I copied from Olivia Newton-John by the way, or you might find another way. But being positive is the best way to get through all this.

I wish you and your husband all the best.