How have others supported you through grief?

It’s hard to know how to support someone who is grieving. We’re often afraid of saying or doing the wrong thing; too many times we don’t do anything. We talk about grief and how to support grieving people in today’s episode, “The gift-curse of fully inhabited grief.” Listen wherever you get your podcasts.

Episode summary:

Grief from an unexpected, tragic or too-early death is devastating. And all too often, loved ones don’t know how to deal with someone else’s deep, uncomfortable and “unfixable” sadness. Memoirist Amy Lin talks about the trauma and sadness of suddenly losing her husband with grief researcher and author Dr. Joanne Cacciatore. They help us understand how we can better support our grieving friends and loved ones.

We talked about:

In this episode, Dr. Millstine and her guests discuss:

• Let people share their love and grief. People feel like they have to hide their grief, which can lead to feelings of shame. But grief is a way of showing how much they love the person who’s gone.
• People don’t know how to respond to grief. They may not intend to be cruel, but many people don’t provide a space for those who are grieving to be themselves. People feel pressured to “get over” their grief. We’re so worried about functioning and productivity that we have lost a sense of community and care, Dr. Cacciatore says.
• Sit and stay with the loss. It’s always hard to not try to “fix” people. But loss is not fixable; we just need to “sit and stay” with what people in pain and grief offer us.

Questions for discussion:

•  Have you had someone support you during grief? What did they do? How did it make you feel?

Share your thoughts, questions and opinions below!