Hi Rgreer, were you able to get off the pills? If not, that’s the first thing you have to do. There is a lot of help out there for you. You have to decide to find it and go for it! I’ve been at a similar place; however, when I realized I was starting to like that pain killer I decided to stop it and by the Grace of God I did it by myself. But I was only taking that pill about 3 weeks so it was much easier than if I’d been taking it overtime. Go for the help!!!! It’s all out there, whatever the help you may need…..family counseling/addiction help, etc. I wish you the best but life will go on, with or without you so don’t do anything stupid as your life is meaningfull and worth living and fighting for! So fight!!