You arre not alone. My PTSD surfaced with a vengence at age 55. I grew up with alot of neglect and verbal and physical abuse as a child at the hands of both parents and older brother, but especially my mother. For the past 11 years I have been her only caregiver (my dad passed and brother has nothing to do with hert) and I spend alot of my life looking after her needs. My husband hates her and she hates my husband. They have not seen each other in 3 years and it’s very very difficult trying to share my time between them both. I’m extremely burned out physically and mentally andhave had cancer and now tremors. I know all too well about the nightmares which I have to this day. My mother now has dementia and has become more need, manipulative and abusive. Her memories of her life are of her being a wonderful mother to me and my brother. Professionals in alzheimers have told me to let her think whatever she needs to think, not try to correct her, and just agree. This is mentally eating at me, because I’ve spent the last 40 years in therapy trying to let go of things she caused. For now, I am just going with the flow, but, its very difficult and yes, the nightmares have increased. She’s now with Hospice and they think she is having difficulty dying because she really does question her mothering. They want me to comfort and let her believe what she wants to believe. Anyway, just wanted to let you know you are not alone. You are not going crazy. Try to love the person that hurt you like they are a stranger and you are doing the right thing for an old frail person. Youve already buried the person that abused you. Your strength will come from handling this the best way you can and if that includes detaching, BUT still loving, you will feel you’ve done the right thing. It’s hard, but hang in there like me and lots and lots of others. I wish you strength and blessings with this difficult job. I send you love.