Too much life to live
Hi guys. I am 39. I have been diagnosed with sfn just last week. I have had symptoms for about 4 years. It wasn't until my feet started burned more consistently that I new I had a problem. It started in my bladder, 3 months after I had to have a total hysterectomy. I went to dr after dr. All of them looking at me as if I was phycosimatic & or they just wanted to push pills. When my feet started burning to the point of not being able walk in certain shoes, I realized that I might have the same condition as my father. He was diagnosed with pn several years ago. Finally after becoming strung out on opioids, he got a spinal cord stimulator. It changed his life!!
My feet began burning about 5 months ago. Since then every week, almost every day, I have new symptoms and new parts of my body that are becoming effected. NO SHIT! Within 5 months it has gone from my feet being uncomfortable in certain shoes to burning, stabbing, vibrating and numb areas all the way up to my face. Something that has help me cope is my father. We have been able to compare feelings & frustrations. He would give me hope that I can still have a life & enjoy my family as they grow & as my husband & I share our time together.
My dad died Tuesday.
He was 63.
My mom doesn't understand what I am going through. She trys and hurts because I hurt. My husband is AMAZING! The first thing I thought when I was diagnosed was, poor Adam. He deserves a better life. He will ALWAYS be here for me. That is great for me, but it absolutely sucks for him. My kids are 18 & 20 so they can move on thankfully.
I guess…I am just having a hard time staying positive. Just put me down! Geez! I am not going to stay drugged up. I am not going to be a test dummy.
I know I am rambling & I know what everyone is going to say. I haven't given up. I am looking into alternatives. Believe it or not, I am always the one who is positive & pumps up people around me!
I am just tired already and I am only 39