Support for father's Parkinson's Disease affecting my health

Posted by divyasg @divyasg, Sep 16 7:20pm

My left side of head always pains a lot. Since my father has a Parkinson disease, I too have a same symptoms. My disease is due to genes. Nerves doesn't function properly when I make observation to myself. I have many concern. But not able to put forward which one to give more preference. How to think properly as a normal person without parkinson disease? What to do in day to day routine such that we will not hurt the opposite person?

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goatgirl28 | @goatgirl28 | Sep 17 7:23am

My husband and I have been coping with my PD for 9 years. Life is day-to-day; PD is hour-to-hour. When I realize I am being mean to him, I stop and say "I am sorry I am being a total pain and I am glad you are here to help me." that usually defuses the situation. For me, the symptom being he most annoying at that moment gets the most attention. Hang in there. PD is a large boat on a long river.

tomcgauley | @tomcgauley | Sep 17 2:40pm

My wife was diagnosed with Parkinson's disease in 2009.

As a caregiver I find it's a careful balancing act between my wife's symptoms and knowing when she needs a little motivation to keep going.
I don't allow her to consume every hour of the day talking about her symptoms. Instead I turn it around and ask her what she thinks will help so I can extract what new symptoms I need to share with her neurologist. I don't allow her to get in a depressed state. I have learned in the 17 years since my wife's Parkinson's disease diagnosis her limits. So I know when to back off and when to say let's go. This especially when she has to get ready to go to her Neuro Physical therapy appointment. She complains about going, but when it's over I can tell she feels better.
Bottom line-Encouragement is the best medicine and care you can give to a love one with Parkinson's disease. Listen and
balance the day to day symptoms and motivation (encouragement). As a former clinician once told me, sympathy can blind a person who is dealing with clients, where empathy can provide encouragement.

How Empathy Enhances Encouragement

It builds trust: People are much more likely to accept your encouragement when they feel you truly understand why they are struggling.

It avoids toxic positivity: Instead of saying a generic "Just stay positive!", empathetic encouragement acknowledges the pain first (e.g., "I know how exhausting this is for you, but I've seen your resilience, and I know you can get through it").

It focuses on the person, not just the solution: It reminds the person of their own internal strength rather than just offering a quick fix.