Share this:

Roxie43
@roxie43

Posts: 1744
Joined: Nov 20, 2011

Stigma & Mental Illness~~Speak Up

Posted by @roxie43, Dec 5, 2011

Albeit shameful and ignorant that it is almost 2012, and many of us are still confronted with biases. judgements and disparate treatment, I encourage all to hold your head up high. I know what it’s like to be looked at differently because of a label, diagnosis or even someones inability to look deeper than the surface.
I often ask myself why some folks behave the way they behave and perhaps I will never find an honest answer. I hypothesize that perhaps there is something in me that may remind someone of themselves or that perhaps that, until recently, I had always functioned so well that those with certain belief systems or stereo-types feel that they are experts on who I am.
I recently posted on ECT and the benefits for me as an individual. Talk therapy is also important because it allows us to process, in a safe and healthy forum, the things that people have said or done to us. I recall when I first requested FMLA at work and a person made the comment “If you cannot report to work maybe you should not work”. I was requesting intermittent leave because the stigma and disparate treatment was taking it’s toll and this so called healthy individual was so insensitive.
I know we have come a long way but we still have a long way to go. Stigma is one reason some don’t admit that something ails them nor seek help. We all have to use our voices, our stories, our expertise (on who were are) and continue to raise awareness about the importance of treating others the way in which one would like to be treated, not selective respect and equality but across the board.
Being good to one another should not be based on pre-conceived notions that certain populations are more worthy than others. We are valuable individuals with strengths, creativity, feelings and we contribute to society wholeheartedly and should always be viewed and treated as such!
Have you been treated differently lately? How did you deal with it?

Reply


Roxie43
@roxie43

Posts: 1744
Joined: Nov 20, 2011
Posted by @roxie43, Dec 14, 2011

Looks as if this issue is not a problem for readers?? That’s great…any ideas as to how to improve acceptance and minimize judgement on the East Coast……
Happy Holidays to All,


Lisa4
@lisa4

Posts: 24
Joined: Jan 29, 2012
Posted by @lisa4, Feb 19, 2012

I know this is late, but I do struggle every day with the stigma from depression, treatment, and ECT. I have been in treatment for over a year and have debilitating headaches every day, memory problems, and other issues that keep me from finishing the nursing school I was attending as well as driving school bus. Onlu now are we even considering moving the treatments to three weeks apart. I stay home and don’t even attend church anymore due to the stigma.

Liked by Roxie43


Roxie43
@roxie43

Posts: 1744
Joined: Nov 20, 2011
Posted by @roxie43, Feb 21, 2012

Hi Lisa,
I’m so sorry about all you are dealing with
Being ill is challenging enough without being exposed to ignorance and stigma. The best advice I can give you is not to allow others to define who you are
Often, those that belittle and discriminate, have deeper issues than we do. Its very easy to focus on another because it is far less distancing than dealing with one’s own life.
I know ECT affects everyone differently so please ensure that your provider is aware of your symptoms. Also make sure both sides (bilateral) is not being done. Unilateral ECT has less side effects including less memory loss. This is only done on the right side of the brain and from a personal perspective helped. However, there are still minor issues like headaches but they have improved from daily to once in a while.
Please don’t isolate. Try to be active and hold your head up high at all times.
Kindly,
Rox

Liked by Redocean


Lisa4
@lisa4

Posts: 24
Joined: Jan 29, 2012
Posted by @lisa4, Feb 21, 2012

Thank you so much for the insight. It is helpful to speak to someone who understands due to personal experience. I do receive bilateral, due to lack of response from the other. My husband and four kids are so loving and supportive, but sometimes I get so frustrated. I used to take my kids camping and plant a huge garden. I even built a deck and patio, but now I sit here, unable to even stand for more than a few minutes without a head rush and dizziness and headache. I want my life back! Sorry to whine so much. I feel so ashamed to put my family through this. It’s so hard to keep going with my head up.

Liked by Roxie43


Roxie43
@roxie43

Posts: 1744
Joined: Nov 20, 2011
Posted by @roxie43, Feb 22, 2012

Please don’t be ashamed. We did not do anything to cause our illnesses but we can fight tooth and nail to recover. I believe in recovery and unfortunately some recover quicker than others. Talk to your family and tell them how you feel. I bet they love you very much and just want you back. Sometimes, in addition to educating ourselves we have to educate our loved ones because often they are misinformed and think we can just snap out of what ails us.
You have to have faith in yourself that you will be building decks and camping again. In the meanwhile, don’t be so hard on yourself. You are human, not some robot and have probably spent your life doing for others. Its ok for our loved ones to uplift and support us as well.
I am proud of you for sharing your story because it shows me and you as well as others that we are not alone. Your friend here is routing for you …

Liked by Roxie43


Lisa4
@lisa4

Posts: 24
Joined: Jan 29, 2012
Posted by @lisa4, Feb 22, 2012

Thankyou so much for the uplifting response. I was taught from a young age to care for others. It’s a big part of who I am. I feel so down sometimes that suicide seems like a viable option just to stop the pain both physically and mentally, to finally end the struggle. Yes, of course I know that that is the depression talking, and that my family needs me. My faith also helps as I pray daily for strength, but I have to say that talking to you and forcing myself into talk therapy every week helps more than anything else. It’s hard for me to trust and to ask for help, but somehow my counselor, Jim, sneakily figured out a way to get past that, and my husband teases me about telling Jim when I start to get down on myself. Again, thank you, and I feel selfish talking so much about me. How are you? I know that I don’t struggle alone. I hope that you are not still being bullied?

Liked by Roxie43


Roxie43
@roxie43

Posts: 1744
Joined: Nov 20, 2011
Posted by @roxie43, Feb 22, 2012

Never hurt yourself even if the pain is overwhelming. Those that I lost to suicide left such a void. And you’re not being selfish because your story is important to others and me. We can be our harshest critics. Its fine with me when someone shares because that is also part of healing
As for me, the bullies don’t like it when one fights back. If they only knew how much they hurt people but they are hurting to so I pray.
No one struggles alone. Make sure you reach out to someone because there are good people in this world.


piglit
@piglit

Posts: 1651
Joined: Jan 04, 2012
Posted by @piglit, Feb 22, 2012

It is always important to remember that there are people out here that are more than willing to listen, understand and if we can to help. You are not alone and I don’t won’t you to ever feel that you are Take care Piglit

Liked by Lisa4


Lisa4
@lisa4

Posts: 24
Joined: Jan 29, 2012
Posted by @lisa4, Feb 23, 2012

I think they hurt others to try to stop thinking about how much they are hurting too. My son has Aspergers Syndrome, and gets bullied every day because he doesn’t fit the mold of most 13 year olds. They think that if they direct everyone’s attention to him, that noone will notice their faults. A stupid reason, I know. I’m proud of you for fighting back. I hope it helps. I am fighting my bad thoughts tooth and nail. I know it’s not the right thing to do, but it’s so hard to keep reminding myself on the really hard days. Good luck sweetie, and I am always happy to talk. Lisa4

Liked by Roxie43


Lisa4
@lisa4

Posts: 24
Joined: Jan 29, 2012
Posted by @lisa4, Feb 23, 2012

Thank you Piglit, and I keep trying to remind myself that there are others also struggling and that truly understand what I’m going through. This is my first effort at communicating with others via my computer. My counselor wants me to put myself out there. It’s so hard, but I really appreciate your comment- Sincerely, Lisa4


Roxie43
@roxie43

Posts: 1744
Joined: Nov 20, 2011
Posted by @roxie43, Feb 23, 2012

I become infuriated when I hear a child is being bullied because that can impact one’s self worth forever. Please make sure your son knows that the bullies are the flawed ones. As for you Lisa, just tell yourself everyday how much you matter to yourself and loved one’s and never forget that the present dark clouds will soon be filled with the warm sun and you will be surrounded by light. I love the sun but if it’s cloudy and dark get yourself a lamp with bright lights because light therapy can be helpful in improving mood. I tend to go to the tanning shop and it does work.
Lisa, Piglit and my other friends let’s try to have a better day! Thank you for your wonderful discussion’s and have a blessed day

Liked by Lisa4


piglit
@piglit

Posts: 1651
Joined: Jan 04, 2012
Posted by @piglit, Feb 23, 2012

Hi lisa . Thanks for responding back. Please always remember that there are people out here that are more than willing to support you through this difficult time. I have got good listening ears and am always here to help in anyway that I can. I can fully understand what you are going through with your son. I have taught many children with Asphergers and they as you know are very special. Some of my most wonderful memories are of the experiences that I have had with these children. My own son was the victim of bullying, both physically and mentally. Hence I had to leave my teaching of many years, as he was being bullied at the school. However, as the years have gone and and he has overcome the difficulties, he has developed into a fine young man. This is the reason why I went into Aged care and found a new career path for myself. When you feel down remember that things always start to look up. Keep the faith, use the inner strength that I believe we all have., and remember that there are people who do care and are always here for you. Stay positive, God bless, Talk again soon Piglit

Liked by Lisa4, Roxie43


Lisa4
@lisa4

Posts: 24
Joined: Jan 29, 2012
Posted by @lisa4, Feb 24, 2012

I had such an odd experience yesterday that I just had to share. I went to the eye doctor to see if poor sight could be contributing to my daily headaches and dizzy spells, and the nurse who helped me choose my glasses ( turns out I do have focusing issues) mentioned that she too suffered from headaches. She mentioned the three meds she takes, and I realized that I take the same ones. She also talked about stress sometimes making things worse, and I mentioned my son and his Aspergers, and she looked really surprised and said that she also has a son with Autism! I felt kind of bad for her, as her 9 year old son is low functioning, and my Cody is really high functioning. I felt bad about that, because even high functioning Autistic children can be very challenging despite their great intelligence and good intentions. I wanted to give her my email address and tell her to contact me if she ever needed to talk or if she needed to take a break, as I know how to care for these special children, but my husband laughed and said that I should resist the urge to care for and fix the world. I did at least give her a little useful info about cheaper meds that should save her a little stress. Is my urge to help and fix a character flaw? It’s one reason that I wanted to become a nurse. I feel so awful all the time lately, but when I’m helping, I’m not “Poor Meing”. Anyway, care and prayers to all of you, sincerely, Lisa4.


piglit
@piglit

Posts: 1651
Joined: Jan 04, 2012
Posted by @piglit, Feb 24, 2012

Hi lisa, I replied to this and somewho lost the message. So I’ll start again. Take no notice iif it reappears. It is such great news about your glasses. Hopefully this will help with your ongoing headaches. You know I am a great believer that when we are on a low ebb with things, that we need to take a little step back. Take time out just for you. Go shopping, a lovely long walk , maybe a coffee somewhere. Something that you enjoy doing just for you. In relation to your question as to the character flaw. No you don’t, You are a very kind, caring soul who likes to help and care for people. This is who you are and a wonderful character trait to have. Try not to be so hard on yourself and take time for you.Remember that I am always hear to talk to anytime, and help if I can. God Bless Take Care. Piglit. Things will get better in time

Liked by Lisa4


Lisa4
@lisa4

Posts: 24
Joined: Jan 29, 2012
Posted by @lisa4, Feb 25, 2012

Thank you piglit- I’m sorry, but I smile every time I type in your name as I grew up feeding piglets on a farm, and they were a lot of fun, though I bet that’s not what you are going for,LOL. My screen name is much less interesting as I am Lisa, and I have four great kids. Anyway, I digress big time, and I apologize for that. I have a bad headache and often try humor to get through instead of meds. I like your suggestion of trying to do a few things for myself, though I find that hard to do. My mom was a 1950’s housewife and mom to 10 kids, though I never see the other nine. They aren’t interested. Mom was also my only real friend, and I’m afraid I got my nature from her. I don’t know how many baby rabbits and squirrels she raised. Unfortunately, she passed just 18 months ago from Alzheimer’s, and I miss her so
bad.I think that has much to do with the depression, though she would look at me and say “You are a great mom to four beautiful children, and they need you, so do what you have to to be there for them every day, and don’t ever let them see you cry.” You know what? I am talking way too much about me. How about you? Do you also struggle with depression? I am pleased to listen anytime.You All have been so kind to me! I thankyou again. It’s made a real difference for me. Care and prayers, Lisa4

Liked by Roxie43

Please login or register to post a reply.