I had an urgent CABG 2 months ago after a heart attack and just now read up on it to find I was put on a heart-lung bypass machine, and there are other options. My heart was stopped for over an hour! I did not have a transfusion but they used a "cell-saver". Now I wish I would have had "off-pump" and minimally invasive Sx because my post op pain was so great. Last week I had another mild heart attack because the smaller graft failed — I am very discouraged. I have to start physical therapy all over. I had NO risk factors for CAD except one: family history. Now I am obsessed with what happened in surgery and how long my heart was stopped, and the pain I went through which was not well controlled. I was so stunned I had a heart attack that I did not want to know anything ahead of the surgery. Why am I stewing over it now? What to do?