New to living with Mild Cognitive Impairment (MCI)
I have recently been diagnosed with MCI and I'll be attending Mayo Clinic group on this. Each day just seems to bring me challenges. I have days when I get depressed because I feel like I'm being a burden to others. I will be attending MCI seminar at Mayo Clinic in January. I need help and support in this area.
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@emyliander, Good afternoon, Sarah. It's been a few weeks since I got your update. You do cover the waterfront very well. I appreciate every word.
The first thing I loved was imagining your extra pretty flowers. Take time every day to put your feet on the earth and focus on something beautiful. I also love listening to all the birds. The beautiful Piliated screeches, the Eagle has a gentle whistle.
My heart goes out to you for all of your work to sell the house. Sounds like it worked…..the very first buyer…..and cash. Wow!
And, the most distressing thing is to learn about the difficulty within your marriage. I know it would be difficult to find a therapist right now as you prepare to leave. I am wondering if there is a self-help series of exercises or better yet a Zoom encounter option. If you think that might work……let me know and I will see what I might be able to find.
It is sad to see that because of a lack of understanding of the cognitive issues that interfere, you become fearful of not remembering something. We, my life partner and I, have an understanding that works pretty well. We even rehearse. If I need help in a conversation, I say "Jay, please help me with the name of the person who came to fish with us last year". I have to give him a little more info in my request. When I get it right, he gets it right, and no one would ever know that i completely forgot the name.
We are very open about my "disabilities" and we don't feel like we have to explain everything. And now for the chuckle……I have tinnitus in my right ear and compromised hearing in the left hear. If the head in the middle ever gives up on me………..
Be safe and wear your mask, be protected and free.
Hi Chris, hope you are doing ok during this pandemic, who would have imagined that we would be going through this. I hope your family has kept well. I have two Grandchildren who graduated from HighSchool, all their senior activities were cancelled. Another came home from college early to finish out the term. My Grandson got a new job and about a month later was laid off, as were all people hired within the past 6 months. Another Granddaughter starts college this fall if everything is back to normal.
Our house is sold and we move out June 12th, we don’t have a place to go to yet, something will workout. My daughter has been home, I took her out of her program before they closed it, now they have opened again but I haven’t sent her back, we still have a number of people in Maine getting diagnosed each day.
Selling the house and going through the inspection was nerve wracking, the first day on the market 3 people came to see it, of course we had to get the 2 cats ,dog, and the three of us out of the house each time. We didn’t spend much time at home that day. The first person bid the highest, over what we were asking and will pay in cash, so that part went well.
We’ve all had our doctor and dentist appointments cancelled and I never did get an appointment to check my memory, I can give them a call again and explain that we are moving, I’m not sure they are even open yet. If it doesn’t get done I’ll have to start all over again in NY……..find a PCP, get a referral and wait again.
My husband and I have had a stressful time with each other, a lot of work to get done on the house and yard, he has a problem with the muscle on his hip replacement pulling away from the bone. Will probably have to have surgery again to reattach it. This has all made him quite irritable and he continues to get impatient with me when I don’t remember things he’s told me. “You don’t listen to me “ which is upsetting to me. But I get through each day with a little help from my friends and mostly thru God
My last brother in Australia has just been diagnosed with a brain tumor, is 85 but otherwise in good health, he says they are a little reluctant to do surgery because of his age so I don’t know yet what they will do.
My flowers seem to be extra pretty this year so I’ve been enjoying them, we’ve had some nice warm days, the birds are all back and singing happily so all is not lost.
Sorry this letter hasn’t been uplifting, I hope that you too are enjoying the Spring and warmer weather, sunny days help a lot.
Stay safe, Sarah.
@emyliander……, Hi Sarah, you have risen to the top of my list again. Thanks so much for responding so that I can imagine just chatting with you and discovering ways to support each other when we run into those memory walls. Since Friday is May 1, I am wondering about your house sale. I think you said you would be reappraising the issues.
I liked the topic you put at the top of your list…."develop an equalized list of home responsibilities" and how you can support each
Does your family have group chats? We are doing that more now…..especially to be able to see how much our little ones have grown and developed words and other ways to express their feelings besides screaming. In Texas it is warm, and so the 3-year-old is running around completely naked and laughing at his Mom because she can't catch him. My adorable Milly (Amelia) will be one next week and she just might be walking.
So, I get quite excited about being included in these once a week family chats. Do you think we will be allowed to fly to Texas soon?
And you are so right….this time of isolation can be quiet and contemplative. You know what Sarah…….sometimes the fatigue just takes over. I think it takes a lot of energy to keep our memories in ready mode. I have tried texting myself, recording a message for myself, and writing notes to pin on my planning desk. Then the anxiety starts when I can't remember which process I used if any.
Day by day, my dear, planning before acting, double-checking our lists before giving up.
My biggest thrill this week……walking outside along the river in beautiful 60's temperatures. Saying hello to the geese and the ducks and doing a little bit of self-love……just enough to give me some "get up and go" energy.
May you have happiness and the causes of happiness.
Hi Chris, I also am laughing to myself, “I hope you are adapting to the refreshing nature of Spring “. Are you kidding, we just had 8” of snow ! Actually we could see signs of Spring before the snow covered it up and they will be there when the snow melts.
I am an animal lover, having at present to cats and a rescue dog Molly, 3yrs old.
I am originally from England and have a brother in Queensland Australia.
Actually I think this time of isolation makes things a little easier on the memory, because I don’t have to remember to go anywhere. The exception was a chiropractic appointment which I forgot, but they they were able to fit me in later that day.
My husband does help with our daughter, but being female the majority of it falls to me.
Our house sale has been postponed till the beginning of May and we’ll reassess then.
I was thinking yesterday about the running of the household in our new home and setting up an equalizing of responsibilities but we haven’t talked about it yet.
Next on my list of things to do is to find my credit card and bank card and the paperwork that I need to send out for my daughters medical care in NY. I’ve been looking for a week now.
How is this restricted time period for you, is it easier or harder ? What are the main problems your memory causes for you ? Right now, for myself I’d say appointments, when I have them, and loosing things.
What I do for myself is get up around 6am and enjoy an hour or so to myself while everyone is in bed. I’m reading again a book “Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff”
They are up now so it’s time to eat breakfast.
Thank you for writing, enjoy your beautiful State and a quieter time.
@helenfrances Yes I found it as we can't get out now so I use it every time I get a new med .
Good afternoon @dougjanehaltom, @erikas Welcome to Connect. We are delighted to have you join us. And thank you Erica for introducing these folks to me. I hope you are getting excited about coming to Mayo in January for the MCI program. And it sounds like it couldn’t be soon enough. I think if I could have any gift for Christmas that I really want and need it would be to be able to cope with my MCI better and become a more organized and contented human.
How long have you been dealing with memory issues? And by the way….are you a male (Doug) or a female (Jane) or someone else? That will help me get everything in the right bucket. I need a little help every once in a while.
At this point in your journey you are working not only on your memory challenges, like appointments and “to do” lists, you are also fighting depression over the thought of becoming a burden to folks in your life.
I wonder if you have been sent any reading assignments or video offerings by Mayo. Perhaps not. If it were me, I would forget what I had read of course. I would need to experience it. It would also be helpful to know if any of your medications or other treatments affect your cognitive efforts. Sometimes just changing the time of day for your dosage can help with the items on your daily calendar or to do list. Foggy brain doesn’t reside here anymore.
Regarding being a burden …… may I propose that you stay in the present, the here and now. I am fortunate that my life partner has been a therapist and knows all the soft kind reminder messages. He rarely, if ever, becomes agitated or perturbed with my….”I forgets”, “I don’t remembers” and “what did you say?” Sharing your experience with your significant other is a huge help…….my wonderful love goes to all my appointments and supports most of my efforts.
So what do you do right now? Here is what works for me……when I can’t remember why I have gotten up and walked to another room only to stand there dumbfounded I just try this…..quiet my mind and stand very still. If I breathe quietly and wait……all of a sudden it will pop into my brain…oh…yes check on the toothpaste supply. The same strategy also works when trying to remember what someone just said. Be quiet, do not talk, request a moment and wait for the other person’s words to return to your mind. It is really important to answer their question or comment as quickly as possible.
So…those are my prizes for today. I will leave you with this memory. My father had Alzheimer’s and my mother ran smack into cognitive decline. It is reassuring to know that my neuropsychologist has told me that I have skipped Alzheimer’s just by my age. Yippee! I am thankful. Have you had any of the tests? How did you do?
May you be content and at ease.
Hey there @colleenyoung, @emyliander, @helenfrances and welcome to @dorty. I know why it is so important to keep Colleen, our director around. If it were not for her, we wouldn't remember when it was reunion time again. And welcome to you @dorty. Hope you enjoy meeting others who have risen above this issue of cognitive decline….finding ways to challenge it, diminish it, and live with it. We have also learned that putting pressure on it from within or without just doesn't do much. So….where are all of you in your journeys? It appears that there have been some postponements, adjustments, and new explorations since we were last together.
Because I know how you are dear lovely folks,……..I will go first so you can get a better grasp of what I am talking about. I have some never before happenings to add to my lifetime of experiences. The first one is a "panic attack" when I just lost it while trying to get my taxes in before the last extension. I couldn't remember the instructions from my tax accountant. He couldn't understand why It was so difficult when we are just about to celebrate 30 years of a business relationship. His words: "it's not like we haven't done this before." I stopped and shared my cognitive issues with him. I think that being a numbers person he may not have understood everything and why I waited so long to get it done.
So my revelation was met with concern and compassion. He hung there with me until late at night and repeated every instruction as needed. It took us three days. The middle day was for my recuperation from the panic attack.
O.K. That is my most meaningful MCI encounter. I struggle with directions, concentrating so hard that I create my own anxiety. On Connect, I will see a name I recognize and tell myself….." when I finish this, I want to go back and check-in with her. Of course, I can't find "her" and because I wasn't paying attention I can't even find "it"….the page.
Anxious to connect with you all and to read your additions. I am sure there are both funny and sad ones. That's OK!
May you all have peace and ease.
Thank you so much Chris I appreciate all the advice I can get. My husband will tell me his schedule for the day and if I don't write it down I don't remember it for 5-10 minutes. A lot of it I feel it's thinking that I'm not going to remember it. I wish I could get over that part of this. That would help me so much. I do write a lot of things down which does help! I am looking forward to the clinic so much. I really need the support and the encouragement. I'm also looking forward to learning different ways that will help me in this as I'm going through this. My husband is Doug and I am Jane.
Hi @dougjanehaltom – I'd like to add my welcome to the others. My husband was diagnosed with MCI in 2015 and I can tell you that the HABIT Program at Mayo was one of the single most important steps we took in coping with the diagnosis initially. I hope you and your husband will find it as useful as we did. I'm also going to recommend another resource that you might find useful. It's a blog by Virginia Laken who was also diagnosed with MCI and also went through Mayo's HABIT program. In it, she shares many aspects of her own journey as she has coped with the diagnosis. You can find the blog at this address: https://virginialaken.com/blog/
Wishing you all the best!
Thanks, so much, Chris! I am 70. Does this mean that Iwill just have mild Cognitive impairment or will this go into Alzheimers? I am trying to do everything that I can to avoid getting worse. Is that even possible? I am so thankful for this support group!