Need help! Depression and anxiety
I don’t know where else to go without going to a hospital. I’ve always had issues with depression and anxiety. It is tough to deal with, but I have a grasp of what it is at least. I’ve been taking 10MG of Lexapro and 1-1.5 MG of Klonopin to treat it. My psych doctor died in January and I started with a new doctor that upped my Lexapro to 20MG and put me on Buspar for anxiety.
She then decided to take me off the Klonpin. She had me go from 1-1.5 to only .5 a day a month ago and then cut me off. My anxity was already starting to increase that month, and a few days after I stopped the klonopin I faced massive panic attacks among a ton of other issues. It took some begging for help until she eventually put me on .5MG of Atavan but I don’t think it is working.
My current symptoms are this horrible brain fog that is impairing my basic functions. I forget things easily, I can’t concentrate. It feels like I’ve literally got dumber. I am clumsier. I keep almost walking into poles and today I almost got run over by a bus. I’m beyond irritable. I almost attacked a man on an elevator because of his breathing, and I’ve never had such violent thoughts before. I’ve had brief sucidical thoughts that I had to talk myself out of because I rationally know I don’t want to do that.
When I stretch my neck it hurts. It feels like my neck or back is violently ripping in two. I’m having out of body experinces. I am sitting at work and suddenly I am not sure if I am dreaming or not
I also have headaches, I’m pacing constantly. I am having muscle spasims, twitching, my hands tremble.
This is terrifying. I’ve never felt like this in my entire life and I don’t know what is going on. Is it the Buspar? The Atavan? The lack of Klonopin and should I go to the hosptial? My doctor isn’t around on the weekends. Any help will be appericated.
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I did not believe in "instant healing" until it happened to me. I didn't even want to go to confession (who does?!) and yet the priest discerned what the problem was and was able to discharge what is known as a "clinging spirit"… so apparently you don't have to believe to be cured! I was quite frankly completely shocked when this "thing" came off my head and my suicidal dark thoughts suddenly became clear and normalized – the brain fog vanished. So I am only sharing my story, because I had never heard the sacrament of confession was such an effective healing route! Read "Slaying Dragons" by Charles Fraune. He interviewed many priests and they are having good success with bi-polar, depression and other mental illness. Today I wonder how many people commit suicide due to this sort of affliction that could be corrected by going to confession and seeking sacramental healing. I learn everything backwards – and if it had not happened to me, I wouldn't believe it either. Just sharing my experience in case someone else wants to seek out a good priest for healing. God loves us and provides channels of grace and healing…. whether we believe or not. For my own part, I was dumbfounded by this amazing experience – and think it is worth sharing so other people understand that they do have a choice.
There is a new series on TV called "Evil" which explores this topic. It is a fascinating look at healing and the belief systems of the catholic church.
When I was in college, I wanted to go into childhood education. My first assignment was writing a paper of the effect of television on a child's brain. After doing the research, I promptly gave up television! (My daughter thanks me for raising her without it today). That was 50 years ago. Unsure I would trust any TV series called "Evil" particularly considering what Charles Fraune and Father Amorth (their books are available on Amazon) have written on the subject – or YouTube has a priest, Father Chad Ripperger who speaks on the subject – most particularly considering what has been happening in secular culture in recent years. The church has a 2,000 year history of healing – it was one of the gifts that Jesus passed on to his disciples – and was the major reason Christianity spread so rapidly despite enthusiastic government attempts to stamp it out. What I did not know until my own experience, is that confession is the sacrament of healing. I had no idea that the priest could discharge mental problems so efficiently in the confessional. So I am personally startled and impressed and naturally think more people should know about it. I would also beware of anything on the airwaves as I believe Jesus referred to Satan as the Prince of the Air – as well as the father of lies. If it is true that 1 in 4 today is suffering from some kind of mental/psychological affliction oppressing them from the outside, it is nice to know something works besides taking drugs or years of therapy. I also found out that I did not have to believe in "instant" relief to experience it. Padre Pio worked many miracles through the confessional in Italy that are well documented. Mayo Clinic believes in "evidence based medicine" and I was diagnosed with major depression – and verified fully recovered! I'm just sharing my experience and hope someone else can find healing as I did. I remain grateful as I'm sure those lepers did when they were healed – or any of the other ailing people that experienced "instant" healing. Today mental illness is a modern stigma like leprosy – and there are experienced and holy priests qualified to discharge it. It is worth knowing about, even if you freely choose to ignore that option. Medical issues are certainly highly personal. I just share my own experience because I certainly didn't remotely expect what happened to me and it seems worth passing along.
***Important Reminder from the Community Director***
Mayo Clinic Connect's Community Guidelines offer 10 short rules of conduct that help keep the Mayo Clinic Connect community safe, supportive, inclusive, and respectful. https://connect.mayoclinic.org/page/about-connect/tab/community-guidelines/
I'd like to draw your attention specifically to guideline 2 regarding respect and being inclusive.
2. Remain respectful at all times.
– Exercise tolerance and respect toward other participants whose views may differ from your own. Disagreements are fine, but mutual respect is a must.
– Be inclusive. Not everyone shares the same religious or political beliefs. Don't impose your beliefs on others.
For some faith is integral to health and healing; for others this may not be the case. For those who wish to continue the conversation about faith, religion and mental health, please participate in another discussion by clicking this link https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/how-spirituality-can-help-stress/
Back to you @stw and @fighter.
@stw, I'd be interested in hearing more about your experience with the monoamine oxidase inhibitor (MAOI), phenelzine (Nardil). What led to your being prescribed an MAOI? How is it working for you? Side effects?
I share in your joy. I'm sure that if I were in your place I'd be wanting to tell the world. Do keep us posted as to how you are doing, going forward. Hang on to the thoughts and feelings you're having right now. This is the best time to strengthen your faith. I've learned that if I practice spiritual disciplines during the good times, I'm better equipped to handle the not so good times that we all face.
I was "liberated" (which is what they call it) in Oct, 2018. Never suffered another suicidal thought – the whole oppression vanished in a flash. So well over a year now. Life is back to normal and other than the usual ups and downs, nothing serious. I am just thrilled to know healing such as I experienced is actually possible – and sad that more suffering people don't know about the confessional as a viable form of healing. I worked with Mayo Clinic and a wonderful MD therapist, but ultimately it was a priest who did the heavy lifting and worked the (fairly dramatic!) final cure. I guess each did our part… I'm just grateful to be alive, brain fog gone, etc.
Thank you for sharing your opinion that those who experience mental challenges "should" go to confession. As I have stated, I was raised catholic. It's always good to hear a success story. I also think it's good to acknowledge that every individual and every catholic is unique. What works for one person of faith may not work for another. May you continue to have good health.
Thanks very much Colleen. It can often be difficult to be the one to have to bring things like this to people's attention. I myself am not religious however, I can appreciate it; and am happy that folks have found what they needed at that time in religion. However, when most of all of the responses continue on that particular path it begins to make me feel like this is clearly not the place for me to come to for help or contribute with such issues any longer. Don't get me wrong, I like to hear about peoples' experiences, i.e. what has and hasn't helped them etc. However, it seems that whenever a board starts on the "path of religion" , it is very hard to get beyond that going forward.
So once again, I thank you for the reminder. As I think it is important that we hear from "Everyone" as we all know, what may work for one, may not work for another!