Happy to have found this online support: Want to connect with others

Welcome @jopa1951. So often caregiving and taking care of things makes attending a physical support group impractical or impossible. I'm glad you found this online support group on Mayo Clinic Connect.

I invite you to scroll through and browse the wide variety of topics in the Caregivers: Dementia group here: https://connect.mayoclinic.org/group/caregivers-dementia/
Or if you are facing a specific issue, like sleep, anger, denial, travel, you can use the Group Search to find discussions related to your questions.

I look forward to getting to know more about you and your wife. You mentioned the challenge of staying positive as the road narrows. Can you tell me a bit more about what is going on today for you?

You'll get lots of support here. It's safe to tell the truth about how you really feel because sometimes the happy face we present to the world hides what's really going on inside. Have courage and patience with yourself.

@pamela78

Well put, Pamela.

Welcome, @jopa1951. Happy travels from a fellow traveler. We who post on this site have been on or are on the same journey. Everyone has been supportive to me and will be to you, too.

George's Wife

George's Wife

@jopa1951

How are you doing? Do you have help with meal preparation?

Hope you are getting used to posting on this board. Here are some useful tips about using thi site:
https://connect.mayoclinic.org/help-center/
George's Wife

Hello GW,
Our daily food schedule starts with my coffee. She doesn't look for coffee anymore.
I prepare cheese and bread (toast).
She cuts up fruit for our yogurt.
We usually go out to dinner, it gets her out of the house. It's expensive but it is our daily entertainment.
I am without help and this is what is working now.
There was a time when I would do the cooking but things have changed.

I'm kinda jack of all guy, lots of projects. I have been cutting them as there is just no time. I have to make my life simpler in order to be attentive. Moving to being instead of doing.
Like now I want to (yeah I'm game for most any thing), instead I am sitting in bed next to her as she sleeps. The more rest she gets the better she does. If I get up to (fill in the blank), she gets up. Days are easier when she is well rested.

@jopa1951 I reflect on your post this morning, as a crisis always makes me look for simpler things. And attentiveness is key, to not only to my loved one but to myself in knowing when I need to stop all the projects and just slow down. I stepped into the caregiving world this year, when my husband was diagnosed at the same time, our house had mold, we had to move out, everything had to go into storage, and we ended up in a hotel for 3 months, then a rental, with more mold, that we had to move out of in 8 days, where I lost two months rent, then finally a peaceful but expensive rental in season in Florida. I never had a moment to slow down. And that made me reflect a lot on what was really important. My husband and I went to a church service on Christmas Eve and it was like the sermon was directed entirely to us and our situation. Courage, Clarity, and seeing the light, God's light not only in times of crisis but every day, to help us get through the day. I find the more rest my husband gets, he is better too. And I find that makes me better too. I like your post and your reminder, at least for me, that slowing down, and just breathing, gives me the courage to face another day, the clarity, to know what's best for me and my husband with MCI, and trusting in the Lord and his light in this courageous path of caregiving. Happy Holidays.

Dear Joe,

Welcome to this website. It has given me a place to share my fears, frustrations and a place to get validation and helpful ideas for what we are going through. This is a really hard journey we are on. There is no user manual or guide to know how things will develop other than that fact that dementia does not get better. Each person's journey is different, sources of support vary and the caregiver's mental and physical health is not immune to the stresses of caregiving. You have done a good thing for yourself in posting here. We all can understand what this journey is like. Please continue to post here and get the support you need.

To Joe and to the rest of my Mayo Clinic Connect family,

I hope that even though misery, grief and sorrow make it difficult to celebrate the Holiday Season, you will find respite by connecting with this commuty or by experiencing moments of joy.

On our collective journey of "the long good bye," there is still beauty in all things sacred.

Magic
Mystery
Misery
Life

Welcome to mayoconnect. I think you will get support, concern and caring people. I am a Caregiver for my spouse. He is getting worse with time. I pray that God blesses our family and gives us more time. He is really is having more obstacles with each week and days that come! Hugs to you and your family.💕