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Caregiver looking for advice

Posted by @raf in Brain & Nervous System, Apr 9, 2012

I have joined this community in the hopes that I will be able to gain some knowledge, insights, advice, or strategies of how to be a better caregiver.

About a year ago, a friend of mine was diagnosed with brain cancer. This is the third time that she has been diagnosed with cancer over the course of her life. She is exceptionally strong, independent, and private. I think the world of her. However, her stubbornness and shyness can make her difficult to help sometimes. I generally feel that my support and presence is enough but lately, I can see that she is really struggling with treatment and I feel like I am useless in doing anything more than serving as a distraction.

For the first time, she is beginning to ask me serious questions to which I do not know the answer. Furthermore, there are things she says that clearly communicate that she is wanting to give up and I do not know how to respond.

The typical strategies that I have found through my research don't really work on her, given that she is so independent and private. So, I am posting this in the hopes that someone will be able to give me some more specific advice on how to motivate, reassure, cheer her up, and convince her that she can rely on me. Any recommendations of where I can look to do more research would also be helpful.

Thanking you.

Tags: Cancer, caregiver, advice, support


Posted by @piglit, Apr 9, 2012

Hi Raf . What a Kind, caring and understanding person you are. A positive approach is always good I work as an aged careworker, people who have high care needs. By the sounds of your dear friend, whom I am sorry that she has had to endure so much, obviuosly is very strong in her approach to the brain cancer. The people that I have looked after and met who have cancer many of them had this approach to living on.An unbelivable strength That I would call a strong will to live. In regards to answering the questions, honesty is really the only way to go. There are also support groups that would be able to assist you as the care-giver. You are a very special person and your friend is so lucky to have someone to support and care for her the way you do. Take care and look after yourself too. Here if you need to talk Piglit and welcome to our community we have a group support group.


Posted by @raf, Apr 10, 2012

Thank you, Piglit!
I really appreciate your speedy response!
I found your advice helpful! I also really appreciate the assurance you have offered me- thank you.


Posted by @piglit, Apr 10, 2012

No worries Raf. Keep in touch and let me know how things are going. Piglit

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