Share this:

Bipolar or just moody?

Posted by @beckyp in Mental Health, Oct 25, 2012

Hi there,
Ive had periods of depression in life, lasting a couple weeks at a time, Ive done lots of risky hellbent things in my 20's. i had PND after each child, got back on track with Zoloft and counselling, and now my counsellor and I are getting in deep (i usually bail after about 4 sessions) but Ive been seeing her for a year now. And she has been noticing how I either come in hyped up, almost hyperventilating, 30 subject changes in one session, or low and hopeless. My doctor diagnosed as Bipolar and has put me on Epilim which so far hasnt done much but its only my second day.

Am i in denial? I feel like 'is this true? is this real?" I have certainly jeapardised my marriage a few times from alcohol and drug abuse and dancing dangerously with flirtations with others. This happens about once a year. After our house settled I had depression, after i visited my screwed up birth family after a 5 yr absence 6 weeks ago ive been on a rollercoaster.

How do i know if its real? I can go weeks with feeling fine and balanced. But geez..when im up im up and when im down im down. I guess it probably happens 2-4 times a year.

Any feedback would be good.


Tags: mental health, womens health

Posted by Anonymous-644dddd7, Oct 25, 2012

Hi Bec, I have a similiar illness - Schizoaffective Disorder. These are both serious mood disorders. It is difficult when the chemicals in our brains are out of balance. This is because what and how we think is influenced by these imbalances. I have read about Bipolar Disorder. What you are articulating - that you are really up or really down - is normal for this condition. Stick with your counselor for a long time and let your doctor know what she says. He/She will be able to help you more I pray right now that you will get your brain chemicals in balance and that you will reach out more to your family.. They can be a good source of support. You may also want to join a support group. I am open to various support groups that are here in Madison, WI. Consider what I said. I speak from experience with mental health professionals. Take care.


Posted by @beckyp, Oct 25, 2012

Hi Anon
Thanks so much for your reply. I reach out to my parents in own family are abusive so I dont want to trust them with the information they have never really handled my depressive stuff. I live in a small country town in Australia, about an hour from a major centre, I guess I could see if there is any groups in that bigger town. I see my counsellor every two weeks. Hopefully the new medication kicks in soon, its only been three days.. seems that big things trigger my up and down stuff... and there are moments of calm in between, but life just feels like chaos internally. Today i feel close to tears but unable to cry, really tightly wound and shallow breath. Yesterday was the same, but in the arvo night i was in a great mood, then found it hard to sleep. THanks for your prayers, and for your reply, i feel pretty alone in it..i have told two best friends and they are minimising it by saying 'well then i must be bipolar too, i have ups and downs' and 'you dont really hurt anyone with it'. but they are wrong, they see my up side as fun party me, and they dont see the fallout, because i dont let them see it.. the last thing i want to be is boring, dull, beige.
anyway, thanks again, i really appreciate your feedback. off to research Schizoaffective Disorder now....

Thanks, Bec

Posted by Anonymous-644dddd7, Oct 25, 2012

I am glad to have made a difference in your life. How is the medical care in your small country town? Here in Madison, WI we get world class medical care. This is because the UW - Madison is one of the top medical centers in the country. It is a teaching school and the job positions for all doctors and therapists are very competitive.


Posted by @anneinside, Dec 6, 2012

Be patient with psychotropic drugs. They frequently take 4 to 6 weeks to get to an effective level.


Posted by @beckyp, Oct 26, 2012

Thanks Anon.. you are so lucky you have those great medical facitities there in Madison..Gloucester has 3,000 people.. Im lucky in that my psych comes over once a fortnight to see her patients. Having an appt in Dec with a psychiatrist. How long since you were diagnosed? I feel like the diagnosis has knocked me for a six (cricket terminology here in Australia!) but im in a bit of denial.. Should I just trust my GP when he says he thinks I have it and take the meds?

Posted by Anonymous-644dddd7, Oct 28, 2012

I am glad that you will see a psychiatrist. She specializes in these disorders. Your GP does not. I would stick with your GP until you begin with your psychiatrist. I was diagnosed with my disorder in 1988. I just could not function. My sleep was disturbed. I heard voices in my head that would wake me up at night. My psychiatrist gave me an anti-psychotic and I was functioning better.


Posted by @bettyann, Oct 27, 2012

I wouldn't be overly anxious about your such...and please DO think twice before you start taking meds.
I know that in the states, we have far too many drs who are SOl quick to dispense happy pills just bedause some pts have gone through some rough periods. I am NOT trying to minimize how you feel at times...its just that what you describe does not sound 'abnormal' to me...
I am not saying these things without having experienced this myself. I DO know that I have had friends who once they got started on antipsychotic drugs...became totally dependant upon them.
Good luck to you... I would maybe talk with a couselor if you feel the need to...Take care!

Posted by Anonymous-644dddd7, Oct 30, 2012

People do not get totally dependent on antipsychotic drugs. People realize that they function better when they take them for many years .like me. People have brain imbalances and need them to be corrected. Brain imbalances are dangerous. When in doubt talk to your doctor about whether people become too dependent on these drugs. She judges whether one needs or does not need. That is what she is trained to do. She knows more than any of us.


Posted by @stageheart, Nov 29, 2012

I would get another opinion as well, just to reaffirm or disprove your diagnosis. As a diagnosed bi-polar patient myself, I know it's really hard to accept the diagnosis but you have to work through it and get to feeling better. 🙂

Please login or become a member to post a comment.