I am struggling to stop drinking. I have no doubts what so ever that I am an alcoholic, and it will kill me if I don't stop. The best I can do is to make a day or two, and then I relapse. I've worked with AA for over 5 years, and I am still drinking. It is a huge burden, and maybe I've painted myself in a corner tight enough that I have no choice but not to drink. I would like to join in a discussion with people who have successfully stopped their alcohol abuse, and could possibly assist me as I attempt once again not to drink. I have no delusions about ever being able to drink alcohol sensibly in the future. I know, that for me, the only option is total and permanent abstinence. Typically by the weekend, I'll be feeling rather well, and then I decide I can have some. If I drink beer, on average, I drink at least 12 and sometimes up to 14. I usually don't drink hard liquor of wine as it really sneaks up on me, and the next thing I know it's the next morning, and I don't remember much. The one thing I am trying is to eat late in the afternoon so I have a full stomach as I approach my alcohol abuse hour/hours (typically starting around 3 to 5, and then drinking for 4 hours after starting).