Dad in Hospital with COVID, 83 yr old mom home alone

Posted by beast66 @beast66, Jan 8 11:28am

My 88 yr old dad is in the hospital with covid and it’s not looking good. My mom is home alone, worried, anxious and lonely. We hope to get results of her Covid test soon. I want to go be with my mom during this very difficult time. We would both wear masks. I don’t want to get Covid, but I am more worried about giving mom Covid if she somehow doesn’t have it. I have 2 teens who have been working on the front lines of it all (one at a grocery and one at a restaurant). What would you do? Would you go be with your mom?

Hello @beast66 and welcome to Mayo Clinic Connect. I am sorry that you and your mother are going through this in isolation from your dad/her husband and also in isolation from one another. Times like this are generally spent together, pre-pandemic, and it is what our hearts and minds generally crave in times such as these.

That said, I do think following COVID guidelines from the CDC are important to ensure your mom is as safe as possible and so you know her results of the test first.

-CDC Guidelines:
https://www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-ncov/index.html
Are you able to find virtual ways to connect while you wait for her test results?

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@amandajro

Hello @beast66 and welcome to Mayo Clinic Connect. I am sorry that you and your mother are going through this in isolation from your dad/her husband and also in isolation from one another. Times like this are generally spent together, pre-pandemic, and it is what our hearts and minds generally crave in times such as these.

That said, I do think following COVID guidelines from the CDC are important to ensure your mom is as safe as possible and so you know her results of the test first.

-CDC Guidelines:
https://www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-ncov/index.html
Are you able to find virtual ways to connect while you wait for her test results?

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I talk to her several times a day. Each time I talk to her, she seems a little more depressed.

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This is one of those extremely difficult decisions to make in these hard times. I cannot counsel you what to do, but if you are able to quarantine for seven days, then be tested, and she is negative, the risks to her would decrease significantly. Is that a possibility? For example, could you and your kids distance enough in your home to make this possible?

Another choice would be to add face shields to wearing masks and go to her. You would still need to take handwashing and distancing precautions as well.
To that I would add making sure the masks are worn correctly over nose & mouth, keeping windows open as much as possible, using an air purifier and sleeping in separate rooms as ways to further reduce risks.

Or do you have another sibling, niece or nephew who has been more socially isolated and can go to her?

Only you and you Mom can decide whether this will work for you.
Sue

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@beast66– Hello. Welcome to Mayo Clinic Connect. I can't imagine how you must be feeling. Times like this are not only incredible but are also trying and make a lot of people very angry. As has been said by others, only you and your mom can make the decision on how you will visit her. Is it possible for you to take Sue's suggestion and then move in with her so she's not alone?

How is your dad doing?

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I am 84 and alone. I just recovered from civic alone, here at home. Not easy but doable. Some days were scary…but day 16 it was gone….symptoms.

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@cctoo

I am 84 and alone. I just recovered from civic alone, here at home. Not easy but doable. Some days were scary…but day 16 it was gone….symptoms.

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@cctoo– Good morning. It's nice to meet you. I am a mentor for Mayo Clinic Connect and I don't think that we have spoken before. Being alone during any illness can be pretty tough, but COVID-19? WOW. And now it's gone. What a strong constitution you must have. Did you have any meals delivered or were you able to care for yourself? Do you have family close by?

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Have family but never see them…took turmeric capsules zinc, Centrum, and then prednisone when lung issues hard to breathe came on day nine…till day fifteen…also used inhaler and Robitussin chest congestion medicine….kept close touch online with my Dr. He did prescribe the other steroid they use in hospital but it is still at pharmacy….no one to get it. Do not need now. I ordered groceries from Kroger and once my granddaughter picked them up for me, .

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@cctoo I'm glad you managed to get over this by yourself. Does any pharmacy in your area offers free delivery? Since covid, a few pharmacies offer this service. My pharmacy has a no contact drive through pick up. Can your granddaughter pick up prescription for you? Have you since got tested? Take care.

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@cctoo

I am 84 and alone. I just recovered from civic alone, here at home. Not easy but doable. Some days were scary…but day 16 it was gone….symptoms.

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So glad you are doing well now, @cctoo. Living alone presents its own challenges and harder when ill without others available to help. You must be a real trooper to have managed so well! Your 16 day marathon had to be anything but easy! Hope I can be as spunky as you at age 84!

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@cctoo

Have family but never see them…took turmeric capsules zinc, Centrum, and then prednisone when lung issues hard to breathe came on day nine…till day fifteen…also used inhaler and Robitussin chest congestion medicine….kept close touch online with my Dr. He did prescribe the other steroid they use in hospital but it is still at pharmacy….no one to get it. Do not need now. I ordered groceries from Kroger and once my granddaughter picked them up for me, .

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@cctoo, I am so glad you were able to stay in close touch with your doctor but so regret there was not delivery available of the steroid from your pharmacy. Until recently when it closed, we had one pharmacy in town which made deliveries.

This evening our local news reported that our civic center would administer the vaccine carside for those unable to access the center. However, there is a real need here but not yet anything in place for mobile units to deliver and administer the vaccs to those unable to leave their homes.

These are challenges many who live alone and without support face and there are no easy solutions. If the vaccine will be available soon in your area, will there be a way for you to get it? Is there a family member, neighbor or friend who could drive you to the location?

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@fiesty76

So glad you are doing well now, @cctoo. Living alone presents its own challenges and harder when ill without others available to help. You must be a real trooper to have managed so well! Your 16 day marathon had to be anything but easy! Hope I can be as spunky as you at age 84!

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Thank you firstly! I have needed to adapt all my life, to difficult situations…. So guess I really am strong… Did great cancer alone too. Am sure you will be strong too if you need to!!

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@fiesty76

@cctoo, I am so glad you were able to stay in close touch with your doctor but so regret there was not delivery available of the steroid from your pharmacy. Until recently when it closed, we had one pharmacy in town which made deliveries.

This evening our local news reported that our civic center would administer the vaccine carside for those unable to access the center. However, there is a real need here but not yet anything in place for mobile units to deliver and administer the vaccs to those unable to leave their homes.

These are challenges many who live alone and without support face and there are no easy solutions. If the vaccine will be available soon in your area, will there be a way for you to get it? Is there a family member, neighbor or friend who could drive you to the location?

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If it is close, I can drive myself…not sure I need vaccine now that I have had the corona virus…..

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