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Almost nonfunctional since I lost my beloved husband. Now my son...

Posted by emmur16 @emmur16, Apr 7, 2016

I have been almost nonfunctional since I lost my beloved husband Emmanuel suddenly became ill and died only sixteen days after developing pneumonia on November 9th,2015.
Now I have learned that my beloved youngest son has been steadily declining after seizures which were treated but his other mysterious ailments such as skin rashes and other serious conditions could not be diagnosed. He finally found a doctor who was determined to diagnose my son's malady. I hear that my boy had a biopsy last week.
Two of my seven living children know of my son's dire condition, but did not want confide in me about his losing ground till the other day saying that they are in fear of losing him but not allowing me to mourn with them that Brendan is in danger of death. He has I hear, finally that he has arranged his funeral He will be fifty seven days after his birth on April seventeenth.
It is not about me but I am in agony knowing abruptly that he is so very ill. I will be 90 on this Sunday and a few days later my boy will be fifty years of age. I buried one son in 1996 and my beloved husband five months ago now facing that devastation of a second son dying. The news is devastating and life now has no meaning.
Does anyone have a child with the same seizures and illness which has progressed to the point of death? Does anyone know why his new and competent doctor would order his biopsy? I called to just hear his voice today and his wife answered. She is a hard worker and never misses going to her job daily. She just sounded stoic and resigned but kept her feelings and his condition under wraps but fear the biopsy results were not
good. I will only hear from someone lets me know that when Brendan is dying or already gone. Your input will let me understand why the first seizure is treated but the symptoms he has are so dire. Thank you

I cannot

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emmur16 | @emmur16 | Apr 8, 2016

Dear Cheryl,
My late husband Emmanuel's grandson, wife and son who bought the farm from Emmanuel twenty years ago, live in the upstairs apartment from me, so I told her and my daughter Laura who is my support always that I fell today. I have the Lifeline button on me all the time even when I go to bed. I did not need it today. The headache from the fall is going away. I did get my back hurting again but it is in the muscles I had thought were getting better and now I have to wait for the muscles to start over again to heal. Outside of that, my daughter is bringing me a walker tomorrow. I don't think my cane is enough right now. I know it is the added stress about the bad news about my son. I am grateful that you gave me something I could look up about the diseases the Wegener starts and it all fits my son's illness. I just have to wait until he wants me to know but now I know want he will tell me when he feels right about it.. I am o.k. Cheryl. When I saw your age I said myself, to myself "Cheryl is very young."
To me being ninety Sunday, you are young, especially to be widowed already and then have Lupus and lose your home besides your son who has the drug problem and everything else. It makes me remember that book, "When Bad Things Happen to Good People". Look up online for someplace in your area that help people when they have troubles like yours.
Goodnight Cheryl and God Bless you

REPLY
1 reply
ccorrconro | @ccorrconro | Apr 9, 2016
In reply to @emmur16 "Dear Cheryl, My late husband Emmanuel's grandson, wife and son who bought the farm from Emmanuel..." + (show)
@emmur16

Dear Cheryl,
My late husband Emmanuel's grandson, wife and son who bought the farm from Emmanuel twenty years ago, live in the upstairs apartment from me, so I told her and my daughter Laura who is my support always that I fell today. I have the Lifeline button on me all the time even when I go to bed. I did not need it today. The headache from the fall is going away. I did get my back hurting again but it is in the muscles I had thought were getting better and now I have to wait for the muscles to start over again to heal. Outside of that, my daughter is bringing me a walker tomorrow. I don't think my cane is enough right now. I know it is the added stress about the bad news about my son. I am grateful that you gave me something I could look up about the diseases the Wegener starts and it all fits my son's illness. I just have to wait until he wants me to know but now I know want he will tell me when he feels right about it.. I am o.k. Cheryl. When I saw your age I said myself, to myself "Cheryl is very young."
To me being ninety Sunday, you are young, especially to be widowed already and then have Lupus and lose your home besides your son who has the drug problem and everything else. It makes me remember that book, "When Bad Things Happen to Good People". Look up online for someplace in your area that help people when they have troubles like yours.
Goodnight Cheryl and God Bless you

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Well I am happy you have family living close to you. A walker is a great idea for you. I hope you feel better soon. And Happy Birthday for tomorrow . Bless your heart, you are kind. Cheryl<br />
<br />

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emmur16 | @emmur16 | Apr 10, 2016

Thank you dear for your sweet message including your Birthday greeting.I think of you often now and think what you are going through and also how young you are and to have so much tragedy in your life all ready. I don't know if sincere emotions of concern can touch someone via the net, but believe me, much I am still trying to absorb losing Emmanuel and now hearing about my youngest son, since I have gotten to know you though the Mayo Contact I think about you frquently and all the people out there who are following the same lonely road as you and me with similar crosses to bear.
Thank you for your sweet messages. God help and bless you. Muriel (emmur16)

REPLY
1 reply
emmur16 | @emmur16 | Apr 10, 2016
In reply to @colleenyoung "Happy 90th birthday @emmur16!" + (show)
@colleenyoung

Happy 90th birthday @emmur16!

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Thank you Colleen for your kind for my birthday.

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ccorrconro | @ccorrconro | Apr 10, 2016
In reply to @emmur16 "Thank you dear for your sweet message including your Birthday greeting.I think of you often now..." + (show)
@emmur16

Thank you dear for your sweet message including your Birthday greeting.I think of you often now and think what you are going through and also how young you are and to have so much tragedy in your life all ready. I don't know if sincere emotions of concern can touch someone via the net, but believe me, much I am still trying to absorb losing Emmanuel and now hearing about my youngest son, since I have gotten to know you though the Mayo Contact I think about you frquently and all the people out there who are following the same lonely road as you and me with similar crosses to bear.
Thank you for your sweet messages. God help and bless you. Muriel (emmur16)

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Thank you for thinking of me and I worry about you. I just pray you can find peace in your life with everything. It's nice having someone to talk to. I hope I don't wake as it is 12:15 am but I had the stomach virus that started last night so I have been sleeping all day and now I am starting to feel better and I cannot sleep now. I hope you had a wonderful Birthday. Cheryl<br />
<br />

REPLY
emmur16 | @emmur16 | Apr 19, 2016
In reply to @emmur16 "Thank you Cheryl. I won't hear about it till my son is so ill and dying..." + (show)
@emmur16

Thank you Cheryl. I won't hear about it till my son is so ill and dying that I will half to hear the truth. I called this morning and he did not mention his real condition if he knows by and his voice was strong but he said nothing else. I did not question him about it. I find it hard to write and type messages I have to go ever each message over and over and correct the typos. I fell two hours ago going into the bathroom. I fell backwards and struck my head and bad back hard because since I learned of how sick my son is and lately I have worse trouble walking. I know it is stress added to my mourning for Emmanuel now. I lay there for a few minutes and then crawled to a chair to stand up. None of my children are going to know about that. My eldest son and youngest daughter will claim I need to be in that nursing home they are still checking. The nursing home is one of my worst nightmares. Anyway, thanks for your for the mention of my
boy's possible skin or bone cancer. At least I will be prepared to be told by the family about it. I know now what maybe I should be prepared when I get the terrible news.You are good to listen to me. You have a sorrow and burden as bad as mine. I feel fortunate to be online on the Mayo Connect. You good people on there and make me feel supported with your messages. God bless you
Cheryl and I hope that you have your burdens removed. Muriel

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Good evening Cheryl,
It was a beautiful day here today. I sat on the glassed in porch here and looked out at the farmland and in back of it the forest on Bridgeman Hill across the way from our home. Emmanuel used to follow the Sun on the porch in the morning where the Eastern Sun shone in after the TIA that stopped him doing the firewood here so he had the time to take it easier due to his health. In the afternoon we had the Western sunlight that is warm and sunny in into the evening from out our kitchen window. I would be getting lunch or supper at those times but I would sit down with Emmanuel sometimes and we would enjoy the warmth and view together.
I have been hoping that you have had some let up in all your obstacles. One needs some relief to help the spirit. I continue to pray or you and your family.
Best wishes,
emmur16
Muriel
My son had three biopsies up on on his left collar bone area. All I can do is wait till they tell me the results.

REPLY
ccorrconro | @ccorrconro | Apr 19, 2016
In reply to @emmur16 "Thank you Cheryl. I won't hear about it till my son is so ill and dying..." + (show)
@emmur16

Thank you Cheryl. I won't hear about it till my son is so ill and dying that I will half to hear the truth. I called this morning and he did not mention his real condition if he knows by and his voice was strong but he said nothing else. I did not question him about it. I find it hard to write and type messages I have to go ever each message over and over and correct the typos. I fell two hours ago going into the bathroom. I fell backwards and struck my head and bad back hard because since I learned of how sick my son is and lately I have worse trouble walking. I know it is stress added to my mourning for Emmanuel now. I lay there for a few minutes and then crawled to a chair to stand up. None of my children are going to know about that. My eldest son and youngest daughter will claim I need to be in that nursing home they are still checking. The nursing home is one of my worst nightmares. Anyway, thanks for your for the mention of my
boy's possible skin or bone cancer. At least I will be prepared to be told by the family about it. I know now what maybe I should be prepared when I get the terrible news.You are good to listen to me. You have a sorrow and burden as bad as mine. I feel fortunate to be online on the Mayo Connect. You good people on there and make me feel supported with your messages. God bless you
Cheryl and I hope that you have your burdens removed. Muriel

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Hello, I was thinking of you. That is odd that your son is getting so many biopsies done. I am sorry it's so hard on you. Well my younger brother had what they said was a mini stroke. And he hurt his leg a couple months ago and it got infected. Saturday he was taken to the hospital when my nephew found him on the floor disoriented and that's when he was told it was possibly a mini stroke. The blood work and cat scan came back fine. They told him he could go home. I called him Sunday and he said he wasn't feeling well and Han numbness on his left side of his body. I told him he should go to another hospital so he said yeah if I still feel like this Monday I will. Well Monday morning he keep falling and dropping things. My nephew said come on we are going to the hospital. He said it took him from 8am till like 2 pm to get him to go. Well today I went up there to see what's going on. They told me that it was not a mini stroke but a major stroke and he had damage on the right side of his brain. His whole personality changed and he is very agitated. They told me he has diabetes and afib also. All he wanted to do is go home. They had to sedate him and it only lasted 45 minutes. When it was time for me to leave he tried to follow me to the elevator to go with me. The nurses had to come stop him so I could go. I knew Saturday that it was more than the other hospital was saying. Thank God my nephew took him to another hospital. I feel so bad for him because he lost his wife in 2012 to cancer. He just doesn't care and he is not taking care of himself. I hope they get him straightened out. He is younger than me. Well that's what is going on here now. But the good news is that my youngest daughter got engaged Sunday and her ring is beautiful. He is a really good guy too. Well I guess my story is long enough for today. Take care and God bless you. Cheryl<br />
<br />

REPLY
emmur16 | @emmur16 | Apr 27, 2016

@ccorrconro Good evening Cheryl,
Just wanted to say I am thinking of you dear. Hope you are finding ways to make things start working for you. Prayers are going your way dear. Take care, Muriel

REPLY
1 reply
Moderator
Colleen Young, Connect Director | @colleenyoung | Apr 29, 2016
In reply to @emmur16 "@ccorrconro Good evening Cheryl, Just wanted to say I am thinking of you dear. Hope you..." + (show)
@emmur16

@ccorrconro Good evening Cheryl,
Just wanted to say I am thinking of you dear. Hope you are finding ways to make things start working for you. Prayers are going your way dear. Take care, Muriel

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How are you doing @emmur16?

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