Never Summer-Depression

Posted by Faune @faune, Oct 27, 2012

I saw that phrase once and never knew what it meant but I think I do now. I'm a 54 year old female and I just don't know how to live my life anymore. I know I've always had depression and anxiety, but now I can't seem to do anything. I love reading but can't focus anymore, I'm tired all the time, I eat when I have to and I worry all the time. Maybe this is a mid-life crises but it feels so much worse. I know I isolate, I don't want to talk to anyone, I want to run away but I don't know to where. Even if I wanted to talk to someone, there just isn't anyone.
A couple months ago I lost my job at the library which I loved but couldn't get to work because I was constantly worried about my 26 year old son. He graduated from college and is trying to find himself, but is floundering, getting tickets, not working - he was doing drugs, but I think he stopped. I constantly worry if he's okay, constantly in fear something will happen to him - I know this isn't normal.
And me, I don't know if it's too late for me to do anything meaningful with my life. I'm fairly intelligent but never finished college - I simply don't know what to do with anything. I'm lost. No money, no job, living with parents(one has Alzheimers), need to leave, need a change, need a life. I'm reading books by the Dalai Lama, taking Paxil, have no counselor, trying meditation and yoga - every day just feels the same. The friends I thought I made - no one's called.
The thing is I know no one can do this for me, I just can't seem to do it either. And running away seems such a good option, but to where and who and without any money.
I don't know how to change this, I don't know where to go, what to do. I'm not married- I've been a single mom for years. If anyone out there has any suggestions of what to do when you get bogged down like this , please, please tell me, I'm so sad all the time , I've made such a mess of things, what do I do?

Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Depression & Anxiety Support Group.

Go to church. That helps one get out of the house. Talk to the minister there,,,, they will listen. If church isn't your thing, join a group called "Recovery",,,,,it doesn't cost anything and it helps people with depression and anxiety. Get outside for a walk at least once a day. Act happy until you feel happy. Fake it until you make it. Take a class through community education,,,, to get you mind busy,,,,,, Never give up on feeling better. Talk to yourself like you would talk to a friend to figure out what to do. Make a plan,,,,then work that plan. Go to church,,,find one near you and walk there,,,join in their activities,,,,volunteer to help others,,, helping others will help yourself feel like you accomplished something. You CAN DO THIS.

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@nevergiveup

Go to church. That helps one get out of the house. Talk to the minister there,,,, they will listen. If church isn't your thing, join a group called "Recovery",,,,,it doesn't cost anything and it helps people with depression and anxiety. Get outside for a walk at least once a day. Act happy until you feel happy. Fake it until you make it. Take a class through community education,,,, to get you mind busy,,,,,, Never give up on feeling better. Talk to yourself like you would talk to a friend to figure out what to do. Make a plan,,,,then work that plan. Go to church,,,find one near you and walk there,,,join in their activities,,,,volunteer to help others,,, helping others will help yourself feel like you accomplished something. You CAN DO THIS.

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Thank you. I will try your advice. I think I've just gotten so bogged down in so many different problems that I can't think clearly. But thank you, I will try.

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