Social Anxiety Disorder and How to Cope or Stop It

Posted by Nay313 @nay313, Sep 28, 2012

Hello Everyone, I am currently suffering from social anxiety disorder, it bothers me from day to day and I don't know how or when it started. I'm always worried about how people view me and what they may think of me. I don't talk to many people and its not that i don't want to but I worry about saying something wrong or doing something stupid and nowadays if you don't look like you know what your saying people would bash you and hurt your feelings in the most painful way, I don't really go out as much unless i'm with my identical twin and some of our friends and even that kind of gets me anxious. Sometimes I hide these feelings because i don't want people to know but really it affects me everday. I hate that it affect my thinking and even how i view myself, relationship with my family and friends. I worry if this would be something I'll deal with for the rest of my life and these same reoccurring feelings will come back. Have anybody suffer this, and know how to cope or stop it?

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I believe the best way is to talk about it and face it. Learn to improve yourself. Accept your errors. Tell yourself it is okay to make mistakes. Don't criticize yourself. Move forward. Believe in yourself. Be confident.

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I also suffer from social anxiety. I've spent most of my life trying to will it away, calling myself a perfectionist, and doing my best to hide the signs of nervousness. It became unbearable during law school, and i started taking Fluoxetine. It helped a lot to reduce the constant fear and "take the edge off." I no longer was overcome with dread at the prospect of going to class or a cocktaill party.

The chemical tweak from the Fluoxetine was only maybe half the battle though. I still disliked that I didn't enjoy social activities like everyone else seems to. I still looked at that as though it was a problem or abnormality--something that I wish I could fix. I've now figured out that refusing to accept that aspect of myself actually compounded the problem. I was already my own biggest critic in every other aspect of life. It really was unfair of me to also beat myself up for my highly attuned sensitivity to others.

I read an article in Time Magazine about a year ago that changed that entirely. It was an article about "the introvert," that basically sang the praises of the introvert. Honestly, it was like my life, thoughts, emotions, interests, and everything else started making sense. I've read some of the books cited in that article now and it's been life-changing. It's changed my whole perspective and helped me understand my needs. And best of all, I don't treat my love for solitude and discomfort of big social life as a disease that should be fixed. One of the books was called Quiet - The Introvert in a World that Can't Stop Talking (or something close to that).

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