Social Anxiety Disorder and How to Cope or Stop It

Posted by Nay313 @nay313, Sep 28, 2012

Hello Everyone, I am currently suffering from social anxiety disorder, it bothers me from day to day and I don't know how or when it started. I'm always worried about how people view me and what they may think of me. I don't talk to many people and its not that i don't want to but I worry about saying something wrong or doing something stupid and nowadays if you don't look like you know what your saying people would bash you and hurt your feelings in the most painful way, I don't really go out as much unless i'm with my identical twin and some of our friends and even that kind of gets me anxious. Sometimes I hide these feelings because i don't want people to know but really it affects me everday. I hate that it affect my thinking and even how i view myself, relationship with my family and friends. I worry if this would be something I'll deal with for the rest of my life and these same reoccurring feelings will come back. Have anybody suffer this, and know how to cope or stop it?

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Yes, I have social anxiety and tend to run away from authority figures. When I really like someone I get self critical. My therapist and I are working on other things. When I have things settled then I will address social anxiety. I am afraid to answer the phone, for example. Some of this is biochemical and some has environmental factors. Just imagine. You would not treat a friend as bad as you treat yourself. 'that part has been covered between my therapist and me. Like you I have a lot to work on. And it is not our fault. As to whether it will last the rest of our lives I do not know. If I were you I would tell your mental health professionals what I have told you. Maybe you need more medicine and/or therapy. I have the right medicine and need therapy every 2 or 3 weeks. Con-
sider what I have told you.

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Meds, therapy, perhaps some different friends? There are some reasonably nice people in the world. I deal with this somewhat also. You must be a very nice person to care what others think. So many people only care about themselves. If possible take it easy on yourself. Your worth has nothing to do with what people that would resort to bashing think of you. Psalm 139 says, "I am wonderfully made.". That includes you. You are going to get this worked out.

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Hello nay313: I'm an old man now and no longer suffer they way you do. I figured out a lot of things and have some help for you. I graduated from college and 3 years of psychotherapy which did me only a little good. When I left I wondered if I would ever find out what was causing my neurosis. It seems so obvious now but when you're trying to look inward your blind. It took me 20 years to figure out that I had grown up terrified of people, some more others less. I was conscientious of what people thought of me, dreaded going to job interviews, nervous around many others and in addition I was known as a NUT CASE by people who had to associate with me. I've heard things about me from friends that make me wonder what could have been going through my mind? And I used to have anxiety attacks.
What I figured out is that it is all about fear. The best way to conquer fear is to face it but that is very anxiety provoking. And it can be so terrifying that facing it will do you little good. The good news is that help may be coming. And I did it. You don't know what I'm talking about so google DOI:10.4236/psych.2012.38093 ,second link from the top.
Young man, my life was largely a wasted, unpleasant experience and yours can be that way also. And it will be if you don't do anything to change it around. My childhood and adulthood was consumed by fear. All I got out of it was my old age and I didn't get all of that. We all got screwed one way or another and none of us did anything to deserve what happened to us. What you have isn't going to go away by itself. My advice to you is to go to a behavioral psychologist and show him/her the DOI which just got published (he probably doesn't know about it).
Once you get your fear under control it's a whole different ball game. Things you worry about now won't have any meaning to you then. I know from experience that you are very lonely and when you start interacting with others yours will go away.
Instead of accepting crumbs from others, you will be able to compete and can get your share of the pie. And so on.
nay313, I wish you what you deserve: Newell Heywood

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I take Ativan which helps a bit but now I am trying Mindfulness, a Zen like approach. Let it flow through you like current and dissipate. Life is absurd. People are absurd in their constrictive tiny boxes. Life moves on. What matter what they think? To agonize over social mistakes, will it matter? No. I don't think so. You sound like a real person to me. Real. That is what matters. People behind their social masks hidden in their snug little worlds are sad. Be free and be whoever you wish. Life is learning. We learn from our successes but tend to ignore them instead, blowing up painful mistakes.

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@callers

Meds, therapy, perhaps some different friends? There are some reasonably nice people in the world. I deal with this somewhat also. You must be a very nice person to care what others think. So many people only care about themselves. If possible take it easy on yourself. Your worth has nothing to do with what people that would resort to bashing think of you. Psalm 139 says, "I am wonderfully made.". That includes you. You are going to get this worked out.

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Your message is encouraging. If I can accept others, then I should accept myself.
Part of what you said - I am wonderfully made - makes sense. We are all in this together in this support group. One person helps me. Then I help someone else.
Glad to read your post Cailer's.

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@annheaney

Yes, I have social anxiety and tend to run away from authority figures. When I really like someone I get self critical. My therapist and I are working on other things. When I have things settled then I will address social anxiety. I am afraid to answer the phone, for example. Some of this is biochemical and some has environmental factors. Just imagine. You would not treat a friend as bad as you treat yourself. 'that part has been covered between my therapist and me. Like you I have a lot to work on. And it is not our fault. As to whether it will last the rest of our lives I do not know. If I were you I would tell your mental health professionals what I have told you. Maybe you need more medicine and/or therapy. I have the right medicine and need therapy every 2 or 3 weeks. Con-
sider what I have told you.

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I am 27 years old. I have anxiety. Where ever i go. What ever i do. I just think bad stuff. I dont what to do. I feel sad. I dont know how to explain it. My whole body hurts. I get really tired.

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@annheaney

Yes, I have social anxiety and tend to run away from authority figures. When I really like someone I get self critical. My therapist and I are working on other things. When I have things settled then I will address social anxiety. I am afraid to answer the phone, for example. Some of this is biochemical and some has environmental factors. Just imagine. You would not treat a friend as bad as you treat yourself. 'that part has been covered between my therapist and me. Like you I have a lot to work on. And it is not our fault. As to whether it will last the rest of our lives I do not know. If I were you I would tell your mental health professionals what I have told you. Maybe you need more medicine and/or therapy. I have the right medicine and need therapy every 2 or 3 weeks. Con-
sider what I have told you.

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I would talk to your psychiatrist and/or therapist. They know how to treat this stuff.
Anxiety always goes away. The relapses are temporary. I hope this comforts you.
Exercise regularly helps. You do not have to be alone in dealing with anxiety. I would definately tell your mental health professionals. If you do not have mental health professionals I suggest that you ask your primary doctor to refer you to a psychiatrist and a therapist.. One former psychiatrist said to ask for referrals and referrals of referrals. I have both a ;psychiatrist and a therapist that I am comfortable with...You may have more than anxiety. I hope that this helps.

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@annheaney

Yes, I have social anxiety and tend to run away from authority figures. When I really like someone I get self critical. My therapist and I are working on other things. When I have things settled then I will address social anxiety. I am afraid to answer the phone, for example. Some of this is biochemical and some has environmental factors. Just imagine. You would not treat a friend as bad as you treat yourself. 'that part has been covered between my therapist and me. Like you I have a lot to work on. And it is not our fault. As to whether it will last the rest of our lives I do not know. If I were you I would tell your mental health professionals what I have told you. Maybe you need more medicine and/or therapy. I have the right medicine and need therapy every 2 or 3 weeks. Con-
sider what I have told you.

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Hi I have suffered anxiety nearly all my life starting from a very young age. With anxiety it comes and goes on different levels. If your on a higher level of stress the anxiety will increase, if everyhting is going fairly okay around you the anxiety will decrease. I don't take medication for mine as I can't due to other medical problems and being on a blood thinner. I take only a little 2mg valium at night, With anxiety try to slow deep breath this helps and long walks in open spaces. I can fully understand the way you feel and at times it is very difficult to deal with. Talk to your dr he maybe able to offer advice, Relaxation techniques may also help. You are feeling tired as the anxiety is too high try to relax if you can. Try not to fight the feelings of anxiety that you have but go with the flow of it and it will subside. Take care always here anytime if you need me Piglit

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@annheaney

Yes, I have social anxiety and tend to run away from authority figures. When I really like someone I get self critical. My therapist and I are working on other things. When I have things settled then I will address social anxiety. I am afraid to answer the phone, for example. Some of this is biochemical and some has environmental factors. Just imagine. You would not treat a friend as bad as you treat yourself. 'that part has been covered between my therapist and me. Like you I have a lot to work on. And it is not our fault. As to whether it will last the rest of our lives I do not know. If I were you I would tell your mental health professionals what I have told you. Maybe you need more medicine and/or therapy. I have the right medicine and need therapy every 2 or 3 weeks. Con-
sider what I have told you.

Jump to this post

Does anxiety make you feel very tired. And does is make you think about bad thoughts.

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@annheaney

Yes, I have social anxiety and tend to run away from authority figures. When I really like someone I get self critical. My therapist and I are working on other things. When I have things settled then I will address social anxiety. I am afraid to answer the phone, for example. Some of this is biochemical and some has environmental factors. Just imagine. You would not treat a friend as bad as you treat yourself. 'that part has been covered between my therapist and me. Like you I have a lot to work on. And it is not our fault. As to whether it will last the rest of our lives I do not know. If I were you I would tell your mental health professionals what I have told you. Maybe you need more medicine and/or therapy. I have the right medicine and need therapy every 2 or 3 weeks. Con-
sider what I have told you.

Jump to this post

Anxiety can make you tired at times but I feel that to try to stay positive and then the thoughts and anxiety will start to subside. I find that when my anxiety levels get to high that I try to wind myself down. Try to think or do things that bring you happiness. Positivity has been my strength and pulling on my inner strength as well. Take care and always here if you need to talk. Piglit

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