I was diagnosed in my 40’s, when I was in medical care for breast cancer and one of my doctors asked me, and pursued the question. Although many of us on the spectrum have some similar issues, we are also different. @mamacita once said that when you’ve met a person with autism, you’ve met one person with autism. I thought that was quite profound. Understanding some of the similarities help our families understand us.
Here is a list of books available on the topic. A website called goodreads.com might be able to narrow the list. Anything written by Temple Grandin will be very insightful as well, if you can find it at your library.