“He speaks of things from his past that scares you”, just from what you have shared I am assuming that he is not tell the doctors of these thing no more than he has confided to you, and until he does the hard work of growing away from these past truamas nothing about him will change, and the abuse is the damage it causes inward, the physical part heals long before the abuse of the inward doubt of self worth. This is a very unhealthy relationship for you, if he does not become more willing to work on himself for clarity of himslf and the harm done to him as well as the harm he’s doing to you , he has a choice as do you to do whats best. You can go to therapy every day, but if you don’t be honest and open then it will be of no effect, as it is here. He is not responsible for his illness but he is responsible for his recovery of self, and all the love in the world will not change him until he makes an honest go at it. Yes it can get really bad, don’t kid yourself. He must want it for it to happen. GBG

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