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Isolation and depression: Scared of the coming winter
I am in my 60's and have suffered with depression and anxiety for many years. I find myself unable to cope with the loneliness that has come with COVID. Although married, it is one of convenience, and there is no help from my husband in that regard, or for that matter, in most everything. I have also gained about 25 pounds during this time and my self esteem is at a low. I eat and eat and am never full. I quilt and hand sew for hobbies, but have now lost the interaction of those friends due to COVID. I am scared to death of what a Minnesota winter will bring. I need someone to talk to.
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Marjou, thank you so much for reaching out. I just told Kim that i was having a horrible day today, mind tailspinning, feeling tired and useless. I truly keep all of the suggestions in my journal, and will try them as I can. I asked my husband for help today, and he just says "I've got nothing". I am ashamed of the feelings of pity I display and want to be strong for my children and grandchildren, but I look in the mirror and really don't like what I see. I hope tomorrow will be a more positive day. I apologize for this post.
@jamsie I can so relate to what you've written. I wonder if your husband and my ex are related (just a little joke)!
No apologies are needed here. I think part of depression for me is shame for what I feel or don't feel or for not being/feeling "normal". The positive side of COVID is that "normal" people are getting to somewhat experience what we deal with every day. I have found this to be a safe place to express oneself. So please keep posting for that is a good thing you are doing for yourself.
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2 ReactionsSending a hug your way.
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1 ReactionI do find some days worse then others. I also have a rare muscle disease that makes it hard to move. I have to keep moving or it hurts to get up, then I have to start all over again to make then move. If I do too much then I can’t move. So I am struggling with this along with OCD, Germaphobic, panic attacks and anxiety. I am not lying when I say I know what your going through (I know you didn’t say that but sometimes people say it and they really don’t have any idea what the person is going through). I have learned that Life is short and I need to be able to function. I say things to myself to keep me going like... Kim your ok, Kim you can do this, Kim don’t be a wimp there are people worse then me. So these and others sayings I say when days are tough. I hope you can find your strength whether it be sayings, writing, or doing it just for you💕. I don’t know if any of this makes sense but hope you at least know you are not alone and that you are Strong 💪🏻💪🏻. Hang in there we are here for you.
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2 ReactionsThank you!
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1 Reaction@kimcvi @jamsie @marjou @artscaping Each of us has our own version of "oh, my goodness this is terrible". It may or may not be the same as our partner, or friend, neighbor, other family members. No one walks in our shoes/moccasins except us. We can have similar life situations but there is still the emotional/social/economic/mental differences that make us unique.
It is my thought that we come here to support each other, to cheer each other on, to offer a shoulder to lean on, an ear to vent to, an example of what worked for us. Never be afraid to share, for you never know who might be reading your words and realizing there is hope, or someone else who can relate to your situation. We have to pull ourselves up by our bootstraps, do the hard work [whatever that means for each of us] and make the best of what we have in front of us. Will it always work, no, but we won't be able to say we didn't try.
Here's to each of us, our struggles, and our victories!
Ginger
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4 ReactionsWell said. It is hard to think that someone actually know what you are going through. You always feel alone and that no one understands. I just hope that anyone that comes here knows that we are not judging that we do understand and that we are here for them.
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3 ReactionsAmen!
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1 ReactionHow are you doing ? I took a long walk with a friend today and it felt so good. She also expressed to me how strong she thinks I am (ME?). I really was surprised that that was how she sees me. Then my best friend from the time I was 5-years-old a called and we had a long talk. She actually told me that she loved me, something she rarely says. She is encouraging me to reach out to my family physician to set up some counseling and a medication change perhaps. It is something I dread doing because I feel like it doesn't always help and I am afraid of putting myself out there. It makes me realize that the problems I have are mine, I can't blame anyone else, and only I can fix them. I just don't have the energy to do it. How do you take that step when you need to? I keep postponing it. It is a hard step to take. I appreciate your listening and support.
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4 Reactions@jamsie, I read your message with joy. What a lovely friend who seems to have been sent to you just at the right time of need.
You ask "How do you take that step when you need to?" You take it one step at a time. Like they say, you can eat a whole elephant, but only one bit at a time. Don't think about ALL the things that need to get done. Just make the first step and make an appointment with your family physician. That seems like a big step, but really it's only a phone call. You can do that. In fact, I'll wait right here while you do it. 🙂
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