~ Whining again: Mistake when I moved here ~

Posted by Barb @amberpep, May 18, 2019

I'm sorry I'm whining again, so I'll apologize right out. No one seems to answer so I think this venting is just more for me. I hate this place ….. I am so sorry I moved to VA. I should have stayed in MD where I was happy, had my own condo, and pleasant environment and people around me ….. here, nothing at all like it. I made a big mistake when I moved here. I hate the thought of living here for the duration.
abby

Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Mental Health Support Group.

@hopeful33250

@karen00 No, not a book. However, there are books of inspirational quotes, probably your library might have a book like that.

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I've been to the "Transitions" group twice now, and I can already tell that, even though nothing has changed for me around here, it is definitely going to help me see things in a more positive way and learn to appreciate my new home turf. After all, I am right at the bottom of the Blue Ridge Mountains, and I know a lot of folks would love that. I do to, sort of, but I trust that this Transitions group is really going to help me learn to have a different way of looking at things. I thank God for that.
I still am debating whether or not to reopen the alimony portion of our divorce. If he had not been so nasty when I asked him for help, just one time, I probably wouldn't be thinking this way. But the way he spoke to me set off all kinds of alarms. I don't want to mess up our family, but at the same time I don't think he should be allowed to get away with that type of attitude toward me. After all, I am the mother of his 3, healthy, well-adjusted kids.
abby

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@amberpep

I've been to the "Transitions" group twice now, and I can already tell that, even though nothing has changed for me around here, it is definitely going to help me see things in a more positive way and learn to appreciate my new home turf. After all, I am right at the bottom of the Blue Ridge Mountains, and I know a lot of folks would love that. I do to, sort of, but I trust that this Transitions group is really going to help me learn to have a different way of looking at things. I thank God for that.
I still am debating whether or not to reopen the alimony portion of our divorce. If he had not been so nasty when I asked him for help, just one time, I probably wouldn't be thinking this way. But the way he spoke to me set off all kinds of alarms. I don't want to mess up our family, but at the same time I don't think he should be allowed to get away with that type of attitude toward me. After all, I am the mother of his 3, healthy, well-adjusted kids.
abby

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@amberpep Yeppers, you certainly are transitioning, and the group is so appropriately named for you! I am sure you will make the correct decision regarding the alimony issue. After all, you need to watch out for yourself first. If you hurt the feelings of your ex, so be it.
Ginger

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@amberpep

I've been to the "Transitions" group twice now, and I can already tell that, even though nothing has changed for me around here, it is definitely going to help me see things in a more positive way and learn to appreciate my new home turf. After all, I am right at the bottom of the Blue Ridge Mountains, and I know a lot of folks would love that. I do to, sort of, but I trust that this Transitions group is really going to help me learn to have a different way of looking at things. I thank God for that.
I still am debating whether or not to reopen the alimony portion of our divorce. If he had not been so nasty when I asked him for help, just one time, I probably wouldn't be thinking this way. But the way he spoke to me set off all kinds of alarms. I don't want to mess up our family, but at the same time I don't think he should be allowed to get away with that type of attitude toward me. After all, I am the mother of his 3, healthy, well-adjusted kids.
abby

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@amberpep. I’m so happy to hear that the Transitions group is working for you! Yea! And good luck working with your ex

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@amberpep Good news. Hope this group continues to be helpful to you.

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@hopeful33250

Hi @amberpep

The new church start-up as well as the Transitions group sounds just ideal for you. Church and support groups have always helped me to see beyond myself and my disappointments and have helped me put it all in perspective. I hope that it does the same for you.

It sounds like you've set some good boundaries with the time you have set to see "Mr. Wonderful." Good for you. I know it isn't easy.

Here is a new MLK quote for you, I hope you like it: "Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase."

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I really like that quote by MLK Teresa .... I'm going to write that down .... it's a keeper.
abby

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I agree, @amberpep. Glad you liked it too!

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I've probably told you all this before, and if so, I'm sorry to repeat myself ... it just lays heavily on me. I moved to Staunton, VA from Frederick, MD about 5 years ago. Two of my 3 children live down this way and when the dentist I worked for retired, I figured it was as good a time as any to make the move. By now, I would hope I'd be settled, comfortable, and happy; instead, it's very much the opposite. I live in a low-income apartment which is supposed to be for "seniors." It is not an assisted living place nor a nursing home. Yet, we have people here who definitely belong in one. Three of our residents are in the hospital, two on the verge of dying, and one with what could be cancer. The ambulance or fire engine is here at least 3 times a week for someone who fell, had a heart attack, stroke, or blood clot. There is nothing to do at all .... no walking path, no pool, no place to ride a bike ... essentially nothing. And, (excuse what I'm about to say), but rather typical of older women .... the gossip and back biting flies around here like moths to a light. I am so sorry I ever moved. To top it off, my X-husband (of 45 years) lives down here, in a big house, he's very active in his church, community, and neighborhood. That's how I was in MD. But now I am even unable to find a church. I signed up for the "newcomer's club" (even though I'm not a newcomer) but all they seem to do is eat out and drink. I don't have money to eat out and I don't drink. Where I live there are also several mentally ill folks who, when they don't take their meds., are very dangerous .... one has gone so far as to threaten several people that he is going to kill them. I have no idea if anyone from the hospital checks on them or not. So, I stay in my apartment except when I take my dog out. This is not the life I expected to have when I made the move or I never would have come. I lived in MD for 30 years. I'm friendly with everyone when I do go to take my dog out, but pretty much stay to myself .... it's just safer that way for a lot of reasons. This environment sure doesn't help someone who deals with depression every day. I was in therapy in MD which helped me tremendously, but that's over now. I feel like the rug has been pulled out from under my feet. Thanks for listening to me whine .... again.
Barb/abby

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