@aliali- My sincere condolences on the death of your dad. I lost my dad when I was 42 but I remember it like it was yesterday. It takes quite a while to grieve but I do not think that we ever stop mourning especially if it someone who means a great deal to us.
I have been depressed almost my entire life. I think right now you are also feeling an immersive amount of sadness.
Grief can cause all sorts of feelings. Anything that you feel right now is normal so try not to think of things as normal or abnormal. Just take the time that you need to mourn your dad. Now is the time for you to take care of yourself. Do you have a therapist that might help you in the future?

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