← Return to The system NOW??

rubbob1 (@rubbob1)

The system NOW??

Just Want to Talk | Last Active: Mar 16, 2019 | Replies (20)

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Hello @georgette12 I agree this is an interesting question! I am Scott and I was my wife's caregiver during her 14+ year war with brain cancer. I think you might find the Caregivers discussion group of interest here on Connect, too!

You can access it by clicking here: https://connect.mayoclinic.org/group/caregivers/ There are lots of folks in this group who talk about a lot of issues of being a caregiver, needing one, idea, hints, tips, and broad shoulders for listening. This would be a good topic for discussion there!

When I grew up every extended member of my family lived within a few blocks in a smaller town in Ohio. Now I do not have a single relative living in the state at all! Everyone has moved for one reason or another! Some went to college and did not come back home. Most had job offers and left for better opportunities. Some married and went to other places as a result.

Fast forward to when my wife got ill. We were in a community with none of our extended family nearby. Our children were in their 20s at the time and my wife made the decision that she did not want her caregiving needs/issues to be their burden. I agreed with that — they had their own lives/children/school to focus on. Addionally my wife's cancer made her mentally different so no one in our neighborhood wanted anything to do wtih her and this extended to her siblings as well as mine.

Caregiving is a tough job, not for everyone, nor can it even be an option given certain diseases, etc.

Would you be intersted in posting your question over on the Caregiving group?

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Replies to "Hello @georgette12 I agree this is an interesting question! I am Scott and I was my..."

@IndianaScott I do not have any kids. Over the years people told me, "Who will care for you when you are old???!!!" My step-son, who calls me his "bonus mom", indicated last month that they will welcome me at their home in Oregon if my husband precedes me in death. I had figured to go it all alone.