~ Depressed and scared, not making it financially ~

Posted by Barb @amberpep, Feb 26, 2019

I'm 74 years old and moved 3 years ago from MD to VA. My girls had hounded me to come down for several years so I finally did it. I sold my condo (at a loss), and a job with a dentist. Well, here I am, and financially I'm just not making it. That amount I earned from the dentist covered me with just a little left over. Now, more than often, I don't have enough. I eeked out just enough for my rent this month, and now there's not even enough for a quart of milk. I get S.S. and what I get goes right out for my rent (usually there's enough), and my son sends me money each month. I'm sickened, depressed, and scared. I live in low income housing, and have a budget that practically squeaks. I'm thinking of starting to sell some of my furniture.
I so wish I'd have stayed in MD, for so many reasons, this being one of them. I have applied for oodles of jobs (they're all on line now), and legally they're not supposed to ask you how old you are (although many do), but they all ask when you graduated from either high school or college .... well, it doesn't take rocket science to figure out how old a person is. I'm so depressed about this, and .so upset that my stomach.constantly churns.
Thanks for letting me vent.
abby

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Lisa Lucier | @lisalucier | Jun 14, 2019

Hello - Some of you have gotten to know @becsbuddy in this thread and elsewhere on Connect, so thought you'd like to know that this week's member spotlight highlights her.You'll read about what brought her to Connect and why she feels comfortable to share in the community, her art quilts and love of the outdoors. https://connect.mayoclinic.org/page/about-connect/newsfeed-post/great-opportunities-are-heavy-burdens-meet-becsbuddy/

Please take a look and make a comment.

smilie | @smilie | Jul 4, 2019

Hi. I’m very depressed! I’m still in bed and I don’t want to get up!!!!

smilie | @smilie | Jul 4, 2019

In reply to @lisalucier "Hello - Some of you have gotten to know @becsbuddy in this thread and elsewhere on..." + (show)

Hi Lisa. I’m depressed and angry and getting worse!!!! That’s all that I’m going to say now.

kaybird | @kaybird | Jul 4, 2019

In reply to @smilie "Hi. I’m very depressed! I’m still in bed and I don’t want to get up!!!!" + (show)

It’s hard but get out of bed. Walk around your house, apartment, condo, wherever you are. It’s ok to still feel angry, sad, unmotivated while doing so, but just getting up will help the depression from getting worse. As soon as you can, go see a doctor.

dianrib | @dianrib | Jul 4, 2019

I've seen physicists- take meds, exercise, read, deep breathing. Xanax for me is a curse I had to go to ER after missing 2 days. My MD NEVER warned me of side effects Shame on them They vow ' First do NO harm' Thought I was dying. Heart beating hard, high BP, sick as a dog. Gave up on psychiatrists. My problem is loss and a broken heart. I struggle each day . Wake up feeling empty My husband & grand son are GONE Its too much for me. There is a limit to what drugs and therapy can do !!!

dianrib | @dianrib | Jul 4, 2019

Doctors help many But surely NOT ALL Best of luck to you They talk & give you pills Its NOT that EZ

MGMolly | @Erinmfs | Jul 4, 2019

HI, I'm sorry for your predicament. I'm 53 and I'm on disability. I felt like this most days, depressed because my job was gone and frustrated with lack of money.

The things I did to get my out of my funk mood over it was budget, budget, budget. Since you worked in a dental office, I'll assume you were saving into a 401k. That's what I did. I went to a financial planner, boy am I glad I did. She gave me a whole new outlook on my finances, and helped me budget for the future. I've investigated many things, and one thing I learned is that senior apartments seem to have a financial sliding scale for ability to pay. I hope your apartment is within your means to pay, but maybe a visit to a financial planner can give you a new outlook on your horizons?

kdo0827 | @kdo0827 | Jul 4, 2019

In reply to @dianrib "I've seen physicists- take meds, exercise, read, deep breathing. Xanax for me is a curse I..." + (show)

It can be so frustrating trying to find something that will help. I’ve finally found that a combination of Cymbalta and Adderral help. I still don’t have any desire to get out and go places but some of that is related to my chronic pain. Normally after I do get out I enjoy things but it’s like pulling teeth(I was a dental practice manager) to get me out. The Adderral has made a big difference in my energy level and it makes me feel good to accomplish things during my day. You’ve certainly had a lot to deal with. Have you tried Cymbalta or Adderral?

Colleen Young, Connect Director | @colleenyoung | Jul 4, 2019

In reply to @smilie "Hi Lisa. I’m depressed and angry and getting worse!!!! That’s all that I’m going to say..." + (show)

Hi @smilie, I hear you. You're depressed, angry and find it hard to get out of bed. But you wrote to us on this message board. Yay!
I agree with @kaybird. No matter how hard it is, getting up, writing to us here, doing even a small thing can help. She is so right to point out that it's okay to still feel angry, sad and unmotivated while doing it. Do you a plan for your day today - even a small thing?