Are we meant to be happy?!

Posted by aliali @aliali, Feb 6, 2019

Yes; this is my question. I am depressed and wonder whether we are meant to be happy or sad. I feel like there are two persons inside me body-one of them would say :"Sure! life is happiness". I hear this answer if I am not experiencing a panic attack. If I experience a panic attack, the other person inside me would say: "The aim of life is nothing but sadness". I am totally exhausted to deal with those two persons! I need the help ASAP! I feel such a black cloud passing above my mind!

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@aliali - that is a very interesting question about whether we are meant to be happy, in light of experiencing depression and feeling as though the answer might differ with experiencing a panic attack or not. Feeling a black cloud passing above your mind does indeed sound very difficult.

I'd like to invite @gailb @cdcc @notaround @yangedd @guener @thankful to offer their insights on this question about whether we are meant to be happy or sad, plus any tips they may have on moving the black cloud away from above your mind.

@aliali - you previously mentioned having been put on a new antidepressant. Have you found that this or any anti-anxiety medications you may be taking or have taken in the past help balance those two persons inside your body warring about whether life is meant to be happy or sad?

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@lisalucier

@aliali - that is a very interesting question about whether we are meant to be happy, in light of experiencing depression and feeling as though the answer might differ with experiencing a panic attack or not. Feeling a black cloud passing above your mind does indeed sound very difficult.

I'd like to invite @gailb @cdcc @notaround @yangedd @guener @thankful to offer their insights on this question about whether we are meant to be happy or sad, plus any tips they may have on moving the black cloud away from above your mind.

@aliali - you previously mentioned having been put on a new antidepressant. Have you found that this or any anti-anxiety medications you may be taking or have taken in the past help balance those two persons inside your body warring about whether life is meant to be happy or sad?

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The answer is yes; medication and eliminating some negative ideas is a good combination for feeling that we are here for happiness and peace. I can have a good life by eliminating this idea. Why am not I doing so? The answer: I fed up with the “CONTRADICTION” I am feeling. Once I experience a panic attack, I feel something which is the exact opposite. How does it feel when the idea that “the sun is dark” and the idea that “the sun is light” are changing into your mind every other day? Will it feel any sort Of calmness? Or, rather, will you wish to throw your brain away just to take some relaxing moments?

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@lisalucier

@aliali - that is a very interesting question about whether we are meant to be happy, in light of experiencing depression and feeling as though the answer might differ with experiencing a panic attack or not. Feeling a black cloud passing above your mind does indeed sound very difficult.

I'd like to invite @gailb @cdcc @notaround @yangedd @guener @thankful to offer their insights on this question about whether we are meant to be happy or sad, plus any tips they may have on moving the black cloud away from above your mind.

@aliali - you previously mentioned having been put on a new antidepressant. Have you found that this or any anti-anxiety medications you may be taking or have taken in the past help balance those two persons inside your body warring about whether life is meant to be happy or sad?

Jump to this post

@aliali; @lisalucier- I'll give this a shot. For one I haven't experienced panic attacks in many years so my insights may or may not be helpful. For me these emotions such as sadness, happiness, joy, etc. are all normal emotions that we feel nearly every day. When I was experiencing panic attacks they usually happened in the midst of doing certain things we all do on a nearly everyday. My 1st one was driving over a very tall & narrow bridge and I panicked and wondered literally if I would make it to the other side. I could go on & on with other stories of attacks, but the theme here is that all these phobias were adding up and before long I felt that just going out I was opening myself up for the next one. I can't give you a reason why this was happening. Things were Ok with work, wife & family?
After finally reaching out to a Psychiatrist I was perscribed 1.0 mg. of Klonopin. Within weeks that fear dissipated and I began to take back my life in small strides. I can do everything I once could not because the panic associated.
Just when a "black cloud" is lifted for whatever reason that I was dwelling on, I sort it out, gave it to God and often Joy pours in. We are complicated beings and are always experiencing a whole host of emotions. Look for things each day that can bring joy into your life. Whether it be friends, family, taking walks, mentoring a younger person. If we fill up the Joy box with lots of small pebbles we'll have lots of joy stored up when somehow a rock falls in our path! Jim @thankful

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@thankful

@aliali; @lisalucier- I'll give this a shot. For one I haven't experienced panic attacks in many years so my insights may or may not be helpful. For me these emotions such as sadness, happiness, joy, etc. are all normal emotions that we feel nearly every day. When I was experiencing panic attacks they usually happened in the midst of doing certain things we all do on a nearly everyday. My 1st one was driving over a very tall & narrow bridge and I panicked and wondered literally if I would make it to the other side. I could go on & on with other stories of attacks, but the theme here is that all these phobias were adding up and before long I felt that just going out I was opening myself up for the next one. I can't give you a reason why this was happening. Things were Ok with work, wife & family?
After finally reaching out to a Psychiatrist I was perscribed 1.0 mg. of Klonopin. Within weeks that fear dissipated and I began to take back my life in small strides. I can do everything I once could not because the panic associated.
Just when a "black cloud" is lifted for whatever reason that I was dwelling on, I sort it out, gave it to God and often Joy pours in. We are complicated beings and are always experiencing a whole host of emotions. Look for things each day that can bring joy into your life. Whether it be friends, family, taking walks, mentoring a younger person. If we fill up the Joy box with lots of small pebbles we'll have lots of joy stored up when somehow a rock falls in our path! Jim @thankful

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I think as human beings it is basic that we are programmed to be happy. Think of young children. They do not know fear. Fear is a learned response. I think that happiness is an innate sense and we are taught or learn that happiness cannot be an actual emotion to have a lot of the time. There are different levels of happiness and there are different types of happiness, just remember that. What makes one person happy does not make another person happy. Just my humble opinion....
Ginger

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Different cultures teach different things. I do not believe everyone comes into the world a happy camper. Seems most behaviors are learned. My input on a highly disputed topic. Philosophy is way too abstract for me.

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@gingerw

I think as human beings it is basic that we are programmed to be happy. Think of young children. They do not know fear. Fear is a learned response. I think that happiness is an innate sense and we are taught or learn that happiness cannot be an actual emotion to have a lot of the time. There are different levels of happiness and there are different types of happiness, just remember that. What makes one person happy does not make another person happy. Just my humble opinion....
Ginger

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Happy is an emotion, so yes but everyone defines happiness differently. Depend on how you define happy.

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Happiness to me is having your children and grandchildren in your life. Lots of Love, touch and feeling respected by others. Lots of animals the creek and making just enough to pay bills Donate to someone in need and giving to God. Plus good tires on your car!!!!! What is your happiness??? HA HA

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Hi. I found your question to be so thought provoking. I have struggled with depression for a long time and at times happiness was hard to find.
I wrote a blog post about this. I hope you read it and find your own happiness
http://www.susancrosby.org

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@suscro68 Thanks for your story, it was helpful. I just thought if we could all say our happys in our life. We might all see our goals in search of happiness. It might have been an uplifter. It actually made me feel happier to say what makes me happy. The thoughts of it were delightful. Thanks again. It sounded like we both have met the thing in our lives that created feeling bad about it to the point of despair. We will fight. Trying to feel closer to God again will find me the best answer.

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@aliali - What a great question. I'd love to invite @parus and @brit and @catcatanzaro60 to join in this thread.
I've been thinking about this a lot and finally have to put in my 2 cents.
The word "meant" means that there is something expected or intended. If this is so, that we are meant to "be something", like happy or serious, etc.. I'd like to ask, "where does this intention come from?" There are a lot of people who believe that a higher power intended us to be happy but I'm not religious and have had some very happy times and there are lot of people who are just "naturally happy".
This "meant to be something" I think sets a lot of us up to expect things (that realistically may or may not happen) and when they don't happen we are are crushed and become depressed or anxious because "I've failed to live up to what is expected."
I think that if everyone was happy I'd think that they were all stoned or haven't experienced life at all. We carry all of our experiences around and realistically they are not all happy. And honestly some are damn right dangerous to our whole beings but mostly to our minds. And you can't just erase what we've learned from our parents or how to react from your minds. They make us who we are.
In no way do I intend to trivialize a higher power or anyone who believes in one. When I thought that I "should be happy" I felt even more depressed and anxious because I was trying to fit in or act like someone I wasn't. Someone a long long time ago in a distant land thought that everyone should be happy because society is better off that way. Or that people are easier to be around if they are happy. I don't dispute that.
There are many different words to define happy but I'm going to say that I am somewhat content. Sometimes I get excited about some future expectation, like a trip, and am happy that I am going to get away but sometimes I'm down because I have lung cancer and PTSD.

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