Welcome to Connect, @chetfreeman. Good for you for writing to your donor's family. I think the gratitude that recipients feel can only truly be understood by recipients themselves. I am not a transplant recipient so I can only try to understand how you must grapple with the emotional and mental side of receiving life at the loss of another. Several transplant recipient members have written about this on Connect. I think it was @contentandwell and/or @rosemarya who shared about this either here or in another discussion.

I applaud that you respect the gift of life and enjoy good physical health and strive to receive the gift graciously with mental wellbeing as well. I assume that it's a process.

Like @wwndy said, it may still be too painful for the family to write back to you. Perhaps they need more time. @contentandwell waited for over a year for a response. Maybe they'll never be able to write, but that doesn't mean that your letter wasn't appreciated. I bet they cherish the thought that their loved one gave life. I encourage to read @dawn_giacabazi's story about how giving the gift of life in time of sudden and unimaginable tragedy was a source of solace for her and her family.

* Living Without You - My Brother's Gift of Life https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/living-without-you/

Chet, what part of the mental aspect do you struggle with the most?

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