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Path to Vulvar Cancer (high grade squamous intraepithelial lesion)
Gynecologic Cancers | Last Active: 3 days ago | Replies (23)Comment receiving replies
Well, she saw something and she didn’t hide it. For whatever it’s worth, after my pathology report from the oncologist was shared with her, she called me. She told me how very sorry she was and that I might want to consider speaking with my priest or rabbi. How’s that for a message of impending doom?
I picked up this same death message from other doctors via silences, extended eye contact (or no eye contact), and long pauses before answering my questions. I don’t think any of them expected me to be alive now, 3 years later. But their messages, on top of the known seriousness of my grade & stage of EC, still resonate…. and I live knowing that the other shoe will eventually drop.
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@ffr Your experiences are so disturbing at so many levels. I just wrote a letter of recommendation for a friend who is a chaplain and is applying for chaplaincy positions in hospital settings. When I think of this friend I think of empathy, no pity (which is what you've described in my view), and a warm and pragmatic approach. I realize that medical providers are not chaplains but this can't be the first time these people have shared frightening news with their patients. And now as I think back to when I met with my gynecologist and asked for a referral to Mayo Clinic he started talking about clinical trials as if I wouldn't make it through the initial stages of treatments. And yet, here I am, 6 years later with no evidence of disease (NED).
I don't know. I'm thinking some providers do this sort of thing better than others. We may not remember the exact words we are told but the emotion sticks with us.
I hope you can live day-to-day even though it is possible that the other shoe will drop. But then, here is something to ponder. What if that other shoe doesn't drop? That's a possibility to, right?