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The 4th & 5th cancer diagnosis?

Breast Cancer | Last Active: Sep 10, 2016 | Replies (8)

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@IndianaScott

Hello @saltis. Nice to make your electronic acquaintance here. I am Scott and I wanted to wish you well today and each day as you continue your journey. While I have not had cancer, my wife fought it for 14 years (her 'prognosis' was for a maximum of 7).

She often felt overwhelmed and frustrated by what she described as a day to day roller coaster ride. One technique she used was to spend just a few moments in the morning over our shared cup of coffee to pick one item for the day. Just one. This was her focal point for the day and her goal. If it got done it was a source of comfort. If it didn't it was simply held for tomorrow with no regrets.

Not sure this will help, but it is simply what she did to help herself during her challenging times. She also adopted the AA mantra of 'one day at a time', which helped both she and I to focus on the day at hand and calm some of the feelings of being overwhelmed and (at times) depressed.

Peace and strength

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Replies to "Hello @saltis. Nice to make your electronic acquaintance here. I am Scott and I wanted to..."

Hi @IndianaScott,<br>Thank you for sharing your & your wife's experience. I do try to<br>concentrate on the Now Time and one day. But unfortunately I have many<br>responsibilities and have to work, pay bills and for the last year we have<br>adopted a refugee son who is the source of many joys in our family. I have<br>a fantastisc and rich Cultural & social life and have never let my cancer,<br>during these past 21 years, stop my activities. Probably not being able to<br>plan ahead Or reserve tickets for the 2017 Cultural events is quite<br>frustrating but having three cancers is quite tiring and effects my energy,<br>you know. How did your wife do to regain energy and enjoy life?<br>Thank you for writing to me,<br>Saltis

Hello @saltis! I hope you are having a pleasant morning. Thanks for the response. Cancer was quite isolating for my wife, which is one of the aspects of Connect I like so much.

My wife's approach was to match her daily goal with her daily level of energy. She had been a Type-A woman, who along with raising our family ran her own business with five locations, so that was quite a change of pace for her. She, too, found long-range planning a challenge. But in some cases it gave her a goal to shoot for or something to look forward to. I have to admit it did not include having to buy tickets, except when she decided our whole family needed to get it together so we could all attend the Macy's Thanksgiving Parade this coming Thanksgiving, which was her favorite and the one holiday she looked forward to. Unfortunately I have had to unwind a lot of arrangements she made, but it gave her joy so we did it.

On a daily basis we worked together to try and identify what 'long term' meant that day and acted accordingly. Not a pleasant or fun aspect to her illness, but it helped her feel fulfilled and not constantly frustrated.

Peace and strength,

Hi @IndianaScott,<br>Thank you very much for sharing your experience. It has been a nice day,<br>tiring but mostly happy to enjoy these late Summer days and the beautiful<br>nature surrounding us.<br>Friends calling via different technical gadgets, from all over the world,<br>sharing their love and affection. I am mostly overwhelmed by this much<br>friendship and love. This afternoon I sat while drinking my coffee and<br>enjoyed a great book. You know, life is good and I made plans together with<br>a friend whom we have not met in almost 35 years over Skype, to meet in USA<br>for holidays. I wish I would be able to meet all other beloved ones who<br>live in USA, too. You see, I plan too.<br>Thanks again for your kind words and have a nice day.