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Loss of Job, Home, Family, Car and Finally Girlfriend (Need suggestions)
I'm at the point right now where I feel like Tom Hanks in "Saving Private Ryan" when he has moments where he goes through discomforting dream like states. I hope for the best but don't trust my instincts to make rational choices. I would really appreciate any thoughts that anyone has. Thanks, Ed
I made decisions in my life that put me here and I’m trying to get out. All of the heartache and failures of my life were muted by the abuse of alcohol. I met my girlfriend or ex almost one year ago.
It wasn’t long after that I knew that she was the love of my life and still is. On our second date she knew about my past. Being fired from PNC for sending out email through my personal email. Losing my home in Northern Kentucky and walking away last September when I feared repossession of my car.
Losing my car last July and then going to a homeless shelter. I have been there five months and seen a lot of horrible things. But all of this seemed manageable because I knew that my girlfriend, Lisa loved me no matter what happened.
Unfortunately the toll that this took on her was unimaginable. Picking me up, dropping me off and spending a good part of her life in helping me through what is a terrible situation.
I haven’t talked to my family in the last six months because I’m pretty sure that they don’t know how to help my situation.
Now I’m at a point in my life where I need to rally myself and save enough money to move out of the shelter. My long-term goal was to spend the rest of my life with Lisa and still is.
So I face a choice. I either rally or fold. My motto of have faith and no fear holds. I have nothing to lose because everything is lost.
I have full faith that God will help me through my crisis. I just have to get to the point.
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When it comes to losing it all, when you hit bottom there is only one way it is going up.
Life is full of surprises and you will be blessed if your faith allows you to walk on water. Prayer will help you have a vision of where you need to go from that situation. I am in the same shoes with now a new baby and a lovely wife that helps me keep focused. Opportunities will come to redress your situation and take you out of the shelter. If you believe in the words "trust and obey for there is no other way " your experience will build you up. So stick to the fight when you are hardest hit, you musn't quit. A new life will come at this new year's turn and you can live to enjoy all your dreams.
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1 ReactionThank you for your kind and positive words!
Keep the faith and don't give up. You are destined for a good life and will be blessed if you follow through with the wise choices. Believe in yourself and be disciplined, look for opportunities to prove to yourself and others that you are worthy of a good life. You can do it!
Good Morning,
Do not fold. If you have survived all that you mention you have tremendous strength and will overcome your current circumstances. Sometimes, we can be our own worst enemy with self defeating behaviors but we can always move forward by learning from our mistakes.
I am so sorry that you have lost so much yet I believe that sometimes loss makes us do a little self inventory and forces us to change for the better. I am a firm believer that I am deserving of happiness based on who I am rather than what I have. Try loving yourself a little more and continue with some type of treatment. Your focus should be on yourself and if you take better care of yourself you will find others will be more willing to be part of your life. It's ok to be a little selfish if it means that you are doing things to enhance your well being.
Material things will follow but your health and well being should be a priority right now. Continue to have faith, work hard and you will reap the benefits....
Be strong and remember this too shall pass!
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1 ReactionYour gonna be okey . Just focus on your strengths and ask god to help you . You become a stronger person because you have experienced it. Good luck!
I also lost my job of 20 yrs.I was happy with my choices for the most part. My marriage wasn't great but I loved our kids enough to try to get along but it was never never enough for my ex. She already financially had me buried. Then my dad who lived up the hill from me with my mom who relocated to live by us. He was a healthy hard working always working hard on projects to better their lives financially. He was not feeling good I believe that he must have been in pain longer than he told the Dr. He had cancer of the kidney and liver was told he would live 3 months it wasn't treatable. I was not believing that! I watched him every day until 3 months later he passed away. I had two back surgeries from 2 disc that had burst shortly before this . I was served divorce papers same time as my dad was dying of cancer and she was having an affair. I lost my job ,my wife remarried and no longer lived with my kids .My boat truck and bank accounts were empty I left the house to her as she was now able to afford it. 5 yrs later while suffering all the depression and anxiety mom died in her sleep. It's been 10 years since my dad died now I am living alone ,no family or friends.I still battle with depression and simply live day to day rarely leaving the apartment.I do get s.s.d.i
For my back and depression and anxiety. I am stuck but too low to change anything. I don't trust my disisions anymore . I pray for strength every night. I'm only 50 and feel like I am done.
Hi, @bessedforsho, and welcome to Mayo Clinic Connect. That's truly a lot of loss. Extremely sorry to hear this.
I'd love for you to meet here on this thread some other Connect members who have some experiences in common with you: @amberpep, @srounkle, @ricktrout, @twobluelady, @danybegood1, @jimhd , @hopeful33250, @carsalespapa, @kaydas, @virtuous69 and @oldkarl . I'm sure they may have some thoughts for you from things they have been through.
I'm assuming from your mentioning you get SSDI for your back, depression and anxiety that you have some history with a doctor who is knowledgeable about mental health. Wondering if you have reached out to that doctor recently about how you are feeling right now?