When plans change because of health issues. How do you cope?

Posted by Ginger, Volunteer Mentor @gingerw, Mar 9, 2020

As a society, we look forward to our vacations, or trips, or social outlets and activities. What happens when we have to modify or cancel those plans, because of a health concern, or our own illness?

Recently I decided to cancel a planned for and highly anticipated trip, due to concerns over exposure to crowds and the coronavirus. I live in a very small rural town, and even heading to the closest "big city", that is only about 20,000 people. I had made travel plans last August, for this March, that's a sign of how excited I was. But I deal everyday with immune system issues, and just cannot justify to myself the risk involved. So, I will stay home, and work on my creative endeavors alone, and "watch" through social media, rather than be in a room with 50 other people from all over the country. Waiting to hear if my payments made will be refunded in whole, or not.

What have you had to change? How has your mindset been modified in light of your own health issues? How have you handled the request of an employer to do a business trip that might take you far away? If your plans include young children, how do you explain to them, how things might be different? With Spring vacations/trips looming on the near future, what will you do instead?

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@jakedduck1

@contentandwell
If it were me I would definitely stop going, of course I don’t like to go in the first place so it wouldn’t be any big deal to me. I wouldn’t miss it in the least. It may be overkill but as they say better safe than sorry. I had to go to the drugstore and file court papers today so I took a small bottle of hand sanitizer with me and used it after I touched anything elevator buttons etc and I told the lady at the pharmacy to keep the change but you just never know. A friend of mine was flying back from San Diego today and I asked him how many people were on the plane and he said very few. That flight is usually packed.
Take care,
Jake

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@jakedduck1 the more I have seen I have decided that it would be irresponsible to go. There’s the old saying that goes something like “change begins with you”. I think I need to heed what the reports are saying to stop the spread of this. The reports from Italy are horrifying. If we all don’t stay put this will get out of control here too and as older people we are at the greatest risk.
JK

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The effect of my illnesses have stretched over a decade. I have several neurological and ortho problems with chronic pain. I've canceled trips, shows, fixing and painting in my home, money, lost cash - 40k of unpaid leave off work, the cost of a law suit. And all my friends are gone. No catching up because my problems are degenerative, it's taken more than 10 years with these conditions, and these things, aside from friends, all happened in the last few years. There is plenty more. Up to and including last night! Had to leave a show I have waited years to see, a simple comedy show. 2 hours max! I couldn't make it.
Adjusting to this type of problem is difficult, still I miss things because I don't know how I will feel when I plan. Keeps me sporadic. 🙂
I'm able to walk without any problems, nerve pain is difficult to understand. Not being ambulatory would crush what's left of my need to get out when it's tough otherwise.
I hope everyone finds some solace in their conditions. I think it takes different times for different people, healthcare is nearly useless in the US, especially mental care, still there are ways to get service, but creativity is difficult when you're ill.

My advice for new patients of longer term sickness, whatever you are afraid to ask, ask. "what is my prognosis?" or "is this normal for my age, condition?" and write a few questions for the doc before your go.
Doctors are human, just with very good recall. They make mistakes, judgement errors, misdiagnose and even miss problems. It's worth a 2nd opinion if you can swing it.
Good Luck to everyone. Especially when things get tough. Think of the other side\end of your illness.

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@contentandwell

@jakedduck1 the more I have seen I have decided that it would be irresponsible to go. There’s the old saying that goes something like “change begins with you”. I think I need to heed what the reports are saying to stop the spread of this. The reports from Italy are horrifying. If we all don’t stay put this will get out of control here too and as older people we are at the greatest risk.
JK

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@jakedduck1 and all this is getting so serious we all need to heed and stop going out to places where people are unfortunately till this virus gets out of the country . People are spreading it how I don't know even the CDC is in the fog so protect yourselve . Take a break and do an old but forgotten craft ,hobby or journaling your life to leave to your grandkids . BEside watching the boop tube . Be inventive in your own home for the time being of course exercise to feel better do what you can to feel better .

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Life is surely interesting/challenging right now. We are far from international airports and seaports in far South Texas, with the nearest virus cases about 300 miles away in San Antonio, so feel relatively safe as long as we hang out here. But the national news has created a sense of panic - the stores are empty of basic supplies, and everyone is rushing to cancel events and gatherings - we can't even buy eggs, milk, laundry soap, toilet tissue or liquid hand soap here - where no one is ill. With that level of overreaction it is no wonder some people are feeling that this is "just hysteria" and refusing to take the situation seriously.

Back at home, the virus is getting a toehold, but the medical providers are not ready - my daughter's big city hospital is trying to decide who and when to test for the virus, and hasn't begun to limit visitors or take other precautions. I am happy to see Mayo Lab beginning to do the tests, because the State Lab in MN is not sure they can keep up with demand.

My other daughter and her young family are scheduled to fly here in 3 weeks, and it is really hurting me to call and tell them that I don't believe our wish to see each other is worth the risk of taking their family on 2 flights and through 3 airports. We are as worried about them carrying the virus either to our senior community or back to the boys' caregivers (also seniors) as we are about them becoming ill. That is the conundrum with this virus - those who are not at risk of being very ill themselves can potentially infect vulnerable populations.

Please everyone, stay safe but don't panic. We're hoping to see the situation resolve in a reasonable amount of time so we can take our planned trip to Austria and Switzerland in the Fall.
Sue

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@contentandwell

@imallears I will be surprised if that big Irish party does not end up getting canceled.
You bring up an interesting thing with your mention of going to your gym. I went to the gym yesterday - not a class, just my own workout - and wiped down each piece of equipment both before and after using and cleaned my hands frequently. The gym at my health club is spacious and rarely crowded so there was no one with 10' of me while I did my thing.
Today I went to the pool and water-jogged. I was very careful in the locker room and washed my hands after touching anything. I am wondering though if it is time to suspend going there. I know that will cause me some depression since I enjoy being active and find home exercise much less appealing but if I did end up catching anything I would be so remorseful. I think I probably do need to suspend. I am struggling because I am not happy about that at all.
JK

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@contentandwell

Well, leave it to us nutty Irish but the Ragland Road bash at Disney Springs has already started. Disney and Universal are closed but the restaurant and stores are open. Half my family dropped out. My daughter and son in law are still pondering. Told them to text before coming over so I can hose them down, if they decide to go.

Stocked up at Publix and Target (empty shelves of paper products) and have enough in my freezer and pantry until Christmas lol.
How much TP does one person need anyway?

My friends and I decided to forgo the gym classes for a couple of weeks starting today and get together for a gabfest instead. I have all the equipment here to do the routine and I still walk. I am not hunkering down, just being mindful of where I need to go.
I will think up some new recipes for @jakeduck while I am at home. I know he will appreciate that.

My wine fridge is full and I bought enough dark chocolate for awhile. Happy hour may come a little earlier than usual. Just hope I don’t get the munchies too much if I binge Netflix, Amazon or Hulu. Yup, we have all 3.

The big Medical Center near us is on lockdown meaning no visitors. Saw more younger children in the stores today than usual due to some closings in the area. We are in a heavily senior populated area so I hope everyone is being sensible. Was going to go
to the library for some new books but had second thoughts about that and may buy a book online instead.

Hope I don’t get too antsy. Stay well everyone.

FL Mary

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@gingerw and everyone, I am here at the hospital with my husband. He is supposed to have surgery to release some of the infection. It is after 3pm and no surgery yet.

Trying to take care of me. So I can take care of him.

Love and light,
Mamacita Jane

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@mamacita

@gingerw and everyone, I am here at the hospital with my husband. He is supposed to have surgery to release some of the infection. It is after 3pm and no surgery yet.

Trying to take care of me. So I can take care of him.

Love and light,
Mamacita Jane

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Jane, how is your daughter?

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@merpreb

Jane, how is your daughter?

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@merpreb , she is awaiting surgery next week. She is good. Still on a ventilator. Alert.
Love and light,
Mamacita Jane

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@mamacita

@merpreb , she is awaiting surgery next week. She is good. Still on a ventilator. Alert.
Love and light,
Mamacita Jane

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Jane what are they going to operate on?

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@gingerw

@mamacita - My heart aches for you and all the hurdles in your path at this time. Was the MRSA healthcare-associated from the things your husband had done?

Those who you were helping in community service are now ready to turn around and help you. As do all of us here at Mayo Connect.

"In everyone's life there are fear storms. Faith flies in all weather." Noah benShea

Sending gentle hugs and a question: what can we do to support you?
Ginger

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@gingerw, just keep the Mayo family faith alive. We are still better together. Even in the middle of the mess.
Love and light
Mamacita Jane

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